Sneaky Industry Jargon, Translated

Does a bear shit on your roof?
Sneaky Industry Jargon, Translated

Sometimes it seems like industries make up their slang just to keep you in the dark and laugh at you behind your back. Of course, that's only true half of the time -- the other half, their purpose is to puzzle you with the shit they come up with. You don't have to take our word for it -- just look at these examples we've collected here and tell us there's a different explanation.

CRACKED bear shit Does a bear shit on your roof? Unlikely - bear shit is what roofers call a tar-like sealant used to waterproof roofs.
topless meeting Don't get excited - a topless meeting is just a meeting where electronic devices are banned to avoid distractions.
wantrepreneur You probably know some wantrepreneur- someone who is always talking about starting their own business, but never does.
Bitching Betty Pilots call the female voice of aircraft warning systems Bitching Betty. That's right, she gives them a life- saving warning and they
gator on the zipper That sounds like something very painful but it's just trucker slang for a blown tire in the middle of the road.
CRACKED COM opening the kimono In business, you open the kimono when you're revealing information. (The information is big, we guess.)

Finance Terms

dead cat bounce In finance, a dead cat bounce is a brief recovery in the price of a falling asset. A dead cat will bounce if it falls from a gret he
CRACKED COM brown star cluster In the military, a red star cluster is a signal flare. A brown star cluster is also a signal - that you panicked and
speech banana You can't eat the speech banana - but it is related to your mouth. It is a region on an audiogram (a chart of pitches and volumes) where
urban whitefish Sanitation workers in New York City have their own slang for different kinds of garbage. Urban whitefish are used condoms. CRACKED.C
Christmas tree Does this thing look like any kind of tree to you? And yet, the well and oil industries give the name Christmas tree to this piece of
dog balls A score of eight in golf is called a snowman, as the number 8 looks like one or, if you lay it on its side, it looks like... well, you alr
pucker factor In the military, the pucker factor is a measurement of fear or stress by how tightly you're clenching your butthole. CRACKED.COM
birth control glasses Enlistment means sacrifice - even of your sex life. There's no other explanation for military-isst specs, often called BCGS or
CRACKED COM if (age == 900) if 900 age) Yoda condition In computer programming, a Yoda condition is one where the terms of the expression are revers
EUCONT POOH This POOH isn't about honey, but oil - in oil fields, it's an acronym for pull out of hole.
suck, squeeze, bang, blow Yeah, no. Sorry. Those are just the stages of a four-stroke engine. (And you thought nothing like that ever happened in your
glory hole We'll stop you right there - or you'll fall down the open-pit shaft called a glory hole in mining slang. (Well, there are shafts involved
crop dusting Of course, airliners don't spray crops - but flight attendants call it crop- dusting when they walk down the aisle while silently rippi
CRACKED COM bury the hatchet When surgeons bury the hatchet, they aren't making peace - it means they forgot some instrument inside you after a surg
penguin diagram Physicist John Ellis lost a bet and had to sneak the word penguin into a paper. So penguin diagrams were born to describe a type o
CRACKED CON refuctoring Some programmers achieve job security by refuctoring their code - that is, purposely making it SO convoluted and hard to und
CRACKEDCON angel lust In mortuary sciences, angel lust is an erection in a corpse. Yup, that happens. And you thought getting a boner in front of th
deceptionist Could you reach the person you wanted? Then the deceptionist has failed- their job is to block access to their boss, not to facilitate
cum folder Don't worry, no one found that well-hidden folder on your computer- a cum folder is what many schools call each student's cumulative recor
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