Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
I used to write movie reviews and other pop-culture musings on a semi-regular basis for Cracked. I also bullshit for a living at www.cortandfatboy.com, home of an hourlong daily podcast about news, pop-culture, and whatever other garbage flits into our tiny brains. Also available via iTunes. And if you want to hear me remixing your pop-culture drenched past, tinyurl.com/geekremixed should just about do it.
The 10 Greatest Fictional Sports Ever Invented
Not all fictional sports are created equal. However, most are loads more entertaining than real sports.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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Kick-Ass Scores A Tentative 'F#@k Yeah' Out of 10
Yes, the movie lives up to its title. In fact, I'd go so far as to say the things these characters do with weapons remind me of the first time I ever saw 'Equilibrium' or 'The Matrix.' Vaughn even has a character specifically name-drop John Woo.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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Clash of the Titans: Badass Metal Video, S#!t Movie
If you arm yourself with headphones and enough Iron Maiden to make your ears want to fight each other, you get the most epic metal video ever put on film. While I didn't have the foresight to bring my own soundtrack canceling apparatus, in hindsight 'Clash of the Titans' almost makes more sense viewed as a collection of moving metal-album co
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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The 5 Most Pointless Ways Big Budget Movies Blew Millions
Movie budgets have gotten so large that it's almost impossible to imagine just what it is they're spending these hundreds of millions on. Well, as with most Hollywood stories, the reality seems more unrealistic than even the worst special effect.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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5 Reasons The Oscars Matter Even Less Than You Thought
The Academy Awards are like Hollywood's Super Bowl (what with the betting pools, the bean dip, the coma-inducing length) but with one important difference: Super Bowl rings are actually awarded on merit.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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5 Movies That Were One Flaw Away From Being Classics
Today we're going to fix some of cinema's most notable films, blockbusters, satires, even erotic thrillers -- all with the careful application of one simple choice.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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The Top 10 Decades of the Century: How The 2000s Compared
Recently, 'Time' named the 00s the worst decade ever. This is a clearly ridiculous notion.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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New Sherlock Holmes: Lethal Weapon 2 In Victorian Clothes
I half expected Watson to sigh at one point and mutter 'Two weeks out from retirement, and then psychotic freemasons try to kill parliament and reclaim America. I'm gettin' too old for this shit.'
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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'Avatar' Is Horribly Written, Way Too Long, Totally Worth It
Until the last 40 minutes of Avatar, there's never been a James Cameron aerial battle, all swooping and banking and pew-pew in grand Lucasian style circa 1977. And then he does it, and it is fucking glorious to behold.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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'2012' Sucks Worse Than the Mayans Could Have Predicted
2012 is like watching a Special Olympics weightlifting event.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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The 5 Most Unintentionally Racist Movies About Racism
If it wasn't for Hollywood making a bunch of well-meaning but ham-handed and accidentally racist films, why, the rest of us would have never learned our lessons! Hail our conquering heroes, the real champions of equality in America.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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5 Reasons It Sucks Being a Joss Whedon Fan
He is a ginger titan, a colossus bestriding the tube of boob. Joss Whedon knows how to make great television. If only he did it more consistently, and without all the accompanying bullshit ...
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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The Informant! Is Not As Bad As The Ads Want You to Believe
The only slot you can easily fit the film into is 'Best Scott Bakula movie.' Farewell and adieu, Necessary Roughness, you had a good run at the top.
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- By Bobby "Fatboy" Roberts
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