13 Headlines That Tenderized Our Grey Matter Like A High-End Handcrafted Marble Meat Mallet

Welcome to the weird world: a place where Sheriff Bilal’s pay-raise-for-me-and-my-friends plan backfired, a waitress was fired for spicing up drinks with her own blood, and an Air National Guard member was arrested for mistaking a joke website for a real hitman service.

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The weird world is full of strange and unexpected occurrences, from 19 Montanans thinking they found a natural spring only to discover it was a bacteria-filled creek, to Kid Rock supporting transphobia, one seltzer at a time. We’ve also seen a deputy rewarded for a fatal mistake, Arnold Schwarzenegger digging himself into a hole, and a man dying in jail after being attacked by bugs.

We’ve seen the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints get away with not reporting child sex abuse thanks to the "clergy-penitent privilege" loophole, the Dalai Lama apologize for a comment he made to a boy, and a guy in Oregon throw away $200K in hopes of blessing strangers.

And finally, we’ve seen politicians in Indiana come together to pass a law that stops police officers from telling lies to kids when they are trying to get them to confess. Damn. Anyway, enjoy.