25 Strange Headlines That Leapt Right Off The Page

Lizzo melted brains by playing a crystal flute once owned by James Madison.
25 Strange Headlines That Leapt Right Off The Page

Lizzo, known for her twerking and body-positive anthems, recently summoned a swarm of trolls - but not the kind you're thinking of. At a concert, Lizzo played a 200-year old flute once owned by James Madison, and some of the internet was NOT pleased with the twerking involved. And on a slightly different note, one Jeffery Moore recently resigned from his position as Gadsden County Commissioner after pictures surfaced of him dressed as KKK member for Halloween – somehow, he thought that would be an appropriate and fun costume to wear, apparently. Just as the cherry on top, he was appointed by Florida Republican Ron DeSantis and was serving in Florida’s only predominantly Black county. And finally, Redditors are trolling Texas' content-moderation law by requiring every comment on their subreddit to call Greg Abbott a piss baby. While some might see this behaviour as infantile or unproductive, we think it's kinda creative (and funny). 

John Paul College student banned from school grounds because of ‘unsuitable’ mullet haircut.

An Australian college student was banned from school grounds for his mullet. GRAGKED.COM The student has been de- nied entry to the school for three weeks thanks to his unsuitable haircut, which is against the College Uni- form and Personal Appear- ance Expectations policy.

Perth Now / Wikipedia

California employers will be required to post salaries for job listings under new law.

Employers will finally have to include the salary on job postings in California. CALIFORNIA REPUBLIC.COM.BR The new bill requires com- panies with 15 or more workers to include pay scales in job postings. They'll probably still make you retype everything on your resume in their online portal, though.

ABC / Wikipedia

This UFO on a U.S. Intelligence Agency’s Logo Has Everyone Buzzing.

The National Intelligence Manager for Aviation accidentally posted a logo with a UFO on it. CRACKED.COM NIM Aviation erroneously posted an unofficial and incorrect logo, says the Office of the Director, which is exactly what the cabal of interdimensional lizard folk want you to be- lieve.

Yahoo / Pixabay

Scientists Create AI-Powered Laser Turret That Kills Cockroaches.

Scientists finally create something good with AI: a laser that blasts cockroaches to death. CRACKED.COM At a low setting, the laser is capable of disturbing the creepy crawlies to flight, where it can then turn up the heat and blast the suckers out of the sky.

Vice / Wikipedia

Jeremy Corbyn played a version of 'Doom' that lets you 'kill Thatcher.'

Jeremy Corbyn was seen playing a version of Doom famous for the inclusion of Margaret Thatcher. CRACKED.COM The arcade cabinet is called Thatcher's Techbase, which is a Doom mod that lets players battle against the undead Prime Min- ister.

Indy100 / Wikimedia

Man caught on video urinating on ex-wife’s grave ‘almost every morning,’

A NJ man was caught using his ex-wife's grave as a toilet almost every morning. LOVE ORDER PROGRESS Levino Momoro RICHARD CONGREVE BORN, SPATE isis 1239 CRACKED.COM The deceased's son began noticing deli bags full of feces placed near the grave of his mother, so he set up a camera and found his mother's ex-husband, with his current wife, uri- nating on her grave.

Yahoo / Wikimedia

Florida reporter defends putting condom on mic during Hurricane Ian broadcast.

A Florida reporter put a condom on her microphone for a Hurricane lan broadcast. CRACKED.COM It helps protect the gear, says NBC2's Kyla Galer. You can't get these mics wet. There's a lot of wind and a lot of rain, so we got- ta do what we gotta do and that is put a condom on the microphone.

USCI News / Wikimedia

California Restricts Use of Rap Lyrics in Criminal Trials After Gov. Newsom Signs Bill.

Rap lyrics will no longer count as evidence in criminal trials in California. CRACKED.COM Governor Gavin Newson signed the Decriminalizing Artistic Expression Act, which follows the recent indictment of Young Thug and Gunna, whose lyrics were directly quoted and used against them at trial.

Variety / Wikipedia

Netflix scrapped their upcoming series Grendel despite having already shot the entire season.

Netflix shot an entire show and then instantly canceled it. 11.521.823 - NETFLIX - - GRAGKED.COM Netflix shot the entire first 8-episode season of the TV adaptation of the Grendel comic book, about a writer that acts as an assassin when the sun goes down, and then decided not to move forward with it.

Screenrant / Unsplash

New law allows Californians to legally jaywalk.

A new law will allow Californians to legally jaywalk without being ticketed. CRACKED.COM Pedestrians can now cross the street outside of an intersection with- out breaking the law as long as it is safe to do so, starting January 1st, 2023.

KTLA / Pexels

Lizzo Plays A 200-Year-Old Crystal Flute, Accidentally Summons A Swarm Of Trolls.

Lizzo played a 200-year-ofd crystal flute once owned by James Madison at a concert. CRACKED.COM The classically trained flutist gave a brief history of the in- strument, lent to her by the Library of Congress, before playing. Certain portions of the US were not pleased with the twerking that accompa- nied the performance.

Forbes / Wikipedia

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