25 Newsworthy Headlines That Are Extra, Extra

A new island formed in the Pacific Ocean that isn’t made of garbage this time.
25 Newsworthy Headlines That Are Extra, Extra

We've all had this thought before (… right?) : what would it be worth to sell my kidney? Well, for one Indian hospital, the answer is $1 million USD. That's right — Google showed an ad from this establishment offering a cool mil for your bodily fluids. On another note, have you ever wondered if babies cry when they eat kale? It turns out that even unborn fetuses grimace at the taste of broccoli's healthier cousin. So next time you're considering eating healthy foods around small children or pregnant women… maybe think again! And finally (in much more alarming news), a student at the University of Utah was arrested after making threats to detonate a nuclear reactor unless their football team won against Oregon State last Saturday night. The woman made these terrorist statements on Yik Yak – a messaging app – causing many users near and far to panic about potential mass destruction. Thankfully, local law enforcement took quick action and apprehended her before any real damage could occur.

Rat causes power outage for more than 1,500 people in Virginia.

A power outage that affected 1,500 Virginians was caused by a rat. CRACKED.COM 1,588 Dominion Power customers were left in the dark for over an hour after a rat infil- trated a piece of equipment, causing the outage.

Fox 5

How Nicolas Cage and his love of cats inspired a new art show.

An art show is honoring Nicolas Cage and his best friend, his cat Merlin. GRACKED.COM Susan Michals is debuting Uncaged: The Unbearable Weight of Genius Cat Art at CatCon, full of Nic Cage inspired pieces, after the movie star talked up his fe- line companion in a recent interview.

Yahoo

Michigan man asks border officer if he could buy pot.

A visibly high man asked the Canadian border patrol if he could buy some pot. CRACKED.COM The glassy-eyed Kyle Schultz declared he had some marijuana, and then asked the border guard if he could pur- chase pot from him. То- tal Kyle move.

Soo Today

Dog pooed in woman's face as she slept leaving her in hospital for days.

A woman was recovering in a hospital for days after a dog pooped on her face in her sleep. CRACKED.COM Amanda Gommo was taking a nap when her daughter's chihuahua had violent diarrhea right into her mouth. We hope her mouth-trans- plant was a success.

Wales Online

New volcanic island just dropped.

A new island formed in the Pacific Ocean that isn't made of garbage this time. CRACKED.COM After just 11 hours of volca- nic eruptions off the Poly- nesian island Tonga, a 50 foot tall, 700 foot long vol- canic island emerged from the salty depths, under a plume of steam.

Yahoo

DOT to map out nation's time zones after report shows no official map exists.

The Department of Transportation realized there is no official map of US time zones. 11 - PULSAR 2 5 - 10 - : . : 3 9 م 8 4 .... . , - 7 5 6 ..... GRACKED.COM An official review revealed that there is no single, accu- rate map showing the na- tion's time zones and local observance of Daylight Sav- ing Time - which may or may not be ending if the govern- ment can get off its ass.

CNN

Long Island Cat Rings Doorbell For Help After Going Missing.

A lost cat from Long Island returned home and rang the doorbell. CRACKED.COM Lilly the cat went missing af- ter her family moved to a new neighborhood, and then suddenly appeared on their Ring camera one day, ringing the bell. This would make her smarter than most of the Long Island population.

PIX11

Missouri man who dressed up as Batman villain learns lesson

A man dressed as the Joker was arrested for making terrorist threats. CRACKED.COM Missouri man Jeremy Gar- nier appeared in a live stream, in full We Live In A Society makeup, threaten- ing to bomb and kill peo- ple. Не claims it was all in character, and just a joke.

Fox

Wily seal that cruised to pond surrenders at police station.

A seal that had been evading police finally turned himself in. GRAGKED.COM The gray seal Shoebert wandered into a Massachu- setts pond and evaded au- thorities' attempts to cap- ture him, until he crossed a parking lot and appeared outside the side door of the local police station.

AP News

Canberra home invasion trial abandoned as doubts linger over identity of perpetrators.

Australian burglars invaded a home, ruined a cheesecake, and hid car keys in their butts. GRAGKED.COM The pair forced their way into a residence, to which the home- owner shouted: Well you've f*cked my cheesecake, game on! They demanded the keys to their car at gunpoint, which police later found between one of their clenched butt cheeks.

ABC

Axios Employees Instructed To Use Axios Funds To Buy Six Copies Each Of Axios Founders’ Dumb Book.

Axios employees were instructed to use company funds to buy the founder's book. GRAGKED.COM SOIX An internal memo told work- ers to buy six copies of the book, each, all expensed to the company itself, and post pictures on social media with the hashtag #axiossmart- brevity.

Defector

The Man Who Thinks Trump Is Christ

An author is promoting his President Donald J. Trump, The Son of Man-The Christ book at Trump's rallies. CRACKED.COM Author Helgard Müller said that he believes there are two Christs, with Jesus be- ing the son of God who was betrayed by Judas, and Trump being the son of man who was betrayed by Mike Pence.

Snopes

Mountain Goats Are Being Airlifted Out of a National Park Because They Crave Human Pee.

Olympic National Park has to relocate goats that crave human pee. GRACKED COM The ballooning popu- lation of 700 goats has developed a taste for the pee of hiking tourists, which serves as a strong source of salt and minerals.

Popular Mechanics

Watch mountain lion turn into ‘kitty cat’ when it discovers a tree swing in Colorado.

A mountain lion was caught on a trail cam playing with a tree swing. CRACKED.COM The big kitty, in the Colora- do wilderness, had been feeding on a deer prior to discovering the swing. The powerful predator was seen leisurely rocking the swing back and forth to its own amusement.

Yahoo

A Mysterious Voice

A mysterious voice is hijacking the intercom on American Airline flights. American.... GRACKED.COM No one knows who is respon- sible, or how they are able to broadcast their groans over the announcement system. The moans were described as somewhere between an orgasm and vomiting.

WAXY

Churches Using "Shameware" Apps to Make Sure Members Don't Watch Porn.

Churches are joining the 21st century to use Shameware apps to make sure people don't watch porn. 15:47 A Camera Photos Fantastical Messages G Settings Swarm These apps, like Covenant Google Maps stant O Eyes, are used by religious Messenger Instagram GRACKED.COM groups and parents to shame people into drop- ping immoral activities. If you join an atheism subreddit, your phone probably just explodes.

Futurism

Norwegian chessmaster leaves game on second move against accused anal cheater.

A Norwegian chess master left a match against the anal cheater after one move. CRACKED.COM Hans Niemann V Magnus Carlsen opened conven- tionally, but Carlsen abruptly left the table af- ter his first move against Niemann, presumably to fulfill the bare minimum of a contract obligation.

The Guardian

Ford can't get enough blue oval badges: Supply chain shortages pile up.

Ford can't get enough of its blue oval logo badges due to supply chain shortages. Ford CRACKED.COM The company briefly con- sidered 3D-printing the in- signia as it expects to have 40,000-45,000 cars near- ly finished at the end of the third quarter, but lack- ing the iconic logo.

Axios

Ye says he's never read 'any' book: 'Reading is like eating Brussels sprouts.'

Kanye West says he's never read a book, and likened it to eating Brussels sprouts. CRACKED.COM Ye says he's more interested in 'good conversation' as a learning tool, as opposed to icky books. Reading is like eating Brussels sprouts for me. And talking is like get- ting the Giorgio Baldi corn ravioli.

USA Today

PUBG is too violent and must be banned, says Taliban.

PUBG is going to be banned in Afghanistan because the Taliban says it's too violent. GRACKED.COM The multiplayer battle royale game causes the young generation to go astray, says a spokesman for the Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan. TikTok is on the chopping block as well, so they got that one right.

PC Games N

Student arrested for threatening to detonate a nuclear reactor unless football team won.

A college student was arrested after she threatened to detonate a nuclear reactor if their football team didn't win. CRACKED.COM The woman posted threats of violence on the Yik Yak app before the game, stat- ing that they would deto- nate the nuclear reactor that is located in the University of Utah causing a mass de- struction.

KSL

Taste of kale makes unborn babies grimace, finds research.

Unborn babies grimace at the taste of kale, while in the womb. CRACKED.COM The Durham University team found fetuses showed a cry- ing expression about twice as often when the mother con- sumed a kale capsule com- pared with a carrot capsule or no capsule.

The Guardian

Google Is Showing Ads To Sell Your Kidney For US$1m In India.

Google is showing fake ads from an Indian hospital offering $1 million to sell your kidney. Renel capsule Cortex Renal pyramids Renel artery Perirenal fat Renel vein Renel pelvis Renel fascia Pararenal fat Renal papilla ureter CRACKED.COM The ad is the work of су- bercriminals looking to trick people into offering up their body parts for the organ trade, which is, de- spite the ads, very much il- legal in India.

OtakuArt

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