15 Facts About History, Animals, and Muppets
What’s one thing you know about flamingos? They’re inherently pink right? Buddy, I can’t even begin to explain how wrong you are. Okay, I’ll give you an easier one: which country needlessly rebranded a common food as “liberty cabbage” in World War I? It’s gotta be America, right? Sorry pal, you’re 0 for 2! Okay, how did the winner of The Mobile Phone Throwing World Championship prepare for the event? Okay, sure, “mainly drinking.” That one was easy.
You know what? You’re not so bad. I think you and I could have been friends, had we met under different circumstances. I’m gonna give you a fact for free: there’s a mineral called cummingtonite. Pretty neat, right? Oh, I’m sorry, you’d like to know why there’s a mineral called cummingtonite? Sorry muchacho, not in my opening paragraph.
Best I can do is a fact that has more context, but whose context doesn’t really enhance that new fact feeling. Ready? This is coming at great personal expense, by the way:
Pugs are older than Jesus.
Okay partner, go on ahead and enjoy those facts now. You’ve earned it.