40 Distinguished Bits of Trivia About Historical Figures Whose Exploits Will Be Revered Centuries From Now

Some of these folks deserve a lot more credit
40 Distinguished Bits of Trivia About Historical Figures Whose Exploits Will Be Revered Centuries From Now

This list was a hard to muster up, because these fine folks made us think “what are we actually doing with our lives?” We get that not everyone can isolate hormones that are now used in a plethora of life-saving medicines and then have an affair with a colleague’s wife, but we need to get out there and do something! The isolating hormones thing is way about our intelligence-grade, but some dudes around here have some pretty cute wives, so… 

Joking! Just joking. Here are some historical figures that all did some pretty wild stuff:

Mary Edwards Walker

Born in 1832, MARY EDWARDS WALKER was a trailblazer for women's rights. She was the first woman to get the Medal of Honor, and she fought for women's clothing reform, health, temperance, and equal rights regardless of gender. CRACKED

Ada Lovelace

ADA LOVELACE wrote about Charles Babbage's Analytical Engine, a computer he had designed, and showed that it could do complicated calculations by following a set of instructions (essentially, a program) in the early 1800s. CRACKED

Thomas Paine

THOMAS PAINE had some pretty forward-thinking ideas. In his pamphlet Agrarian Justice from the late 1700s, he proposed a social welfare system, a universal minimum income, and a tax on wealth and estates - ideas pretty radical even now. CRACKED

Mary Shelley

MARY SHELLEY wrote a book at 19 that has become a classic - Frankenstein. Written in the 19th century, it was science fiction exploring themes of scientific progress, human dignity, and justice. CRACKED

Alan Turing

ALAN TURING came up with the idea of a universal Turing machine, which was like a blueprint for a computer, and helped create the first electronic computer-all in the 1940s. CRACKED

Francis Hopkinson

CRACKED.COM The original American Flag was designed by this guy. This is Francis Hopkinson, the early Congress' graphics guy. Congressional journals explicitly name him as the creator of the first flag. The whole Betsy Ross thing was based on testimony by her own family.

Percy Julian

In 1940, Percy Julian figured out how to isolate hormones so they could be used in medicine. These hormones are used in steroids, which are in everything from birth control pills to arthritis cream to asthma, eczema, and cancer treatments. His downfall came Yet he remains virtually when a disgruntled unknown. colleague leaked several snarky letters from Julian to the press. Couple that with an affair with his assistant's wife, and he became a pariah whom nobody noticed until 2004. CRACKED.COM http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/julian/producer.html

Isaac Newton

Sir Isaac Newton is highly revered for his groundbreaking discoveries in the areas of gravity, calculus, and optics, among other scientific pursuits. THE CRAZY: It's now thought that alchemy was his true passion. Newton devoted a vast amount of time to trying to create the philosopher's stone, which he believed could transmute other metals into gold and grant human beings immortality. CRACKED.COM http://discovermagazine. com/2010/jul-aug/05-isaac-newton-worlds-most-famous-alchemist

The Zhengde Emperor

Meet the Zhengde Emperor of China. Не reigned during the early 16th century. His era name means Right virtue or Rectification of virtue. Our Make People Differed The THE CRAZY: Не liked to play make-believe. Не had a fake city block built on the imperial grounds so he could pretend to be a shopkeeper, and he liked to pretend he was a general and go on raiding parties. CRACKED COM DavidM Robinson 2001 Bandits Eunuchs, and the Son of Heaven

John Quincy Adams

John Quincy Adams was the 6th President. Не was a celebrated diplomat, one of the authors of the Monroe Doctrine, and a vocal opponent of slavery. THE CRAZY: Не also believed in Mole People. Adams greenlit an expedition to travel to the center of the earth and establish diplomatic relations with the mole people living there. The trip never happened, because Adams left office before it could be planned. CRACKED.COM Adams, John Q Memoirs of John Quincy Adams.

Charles VI

This is Charles the Mad VI. Не was king of France at the turn of the 14th century, and was known in the early part of his reign as Charles the Beloved. THE CRAZY: Не thought he was a wolf made of glass. Не used to run through the castle, howling and chasing people, and he didn't want anyone to touch him, because he thought he would shatter. CRACKED.COM http://faculty.history.wisc. .edu/sommerville/1

Justin II

Justin II was a 6th century Byzantine emperor. He's considered one of the most important figures of his era, as he sought to restore the empire's greatness and reconquer the lost western half of the historical Roman Empire. THE CRAZY: Не heard voices and bit people. According to ancient historian John of Ephesus, Justin II would hear voices in his head and scream and hide under his bed to escape them. His servants would play organ music throughout the palace to drown out the voices and keep him from biting their heads. Legend has it he actually ate two of

Stonewall Jackson

Stonewall Jackson was an icon of Southern heroism and commitment during the Civil War. Historians consider him one of the most gifted tactical commanders in U.S. history. THE CRAZY: Не believed his arms were of unequal length, and he would constantly raise the longer one in the air, to balance out his circulation. It was his arm that caused his death. Не was shot in the left arm by friendly fire, and the arm was amputated. We don't know whether it was the arm he kept raised, but it seems ARM OF likely. Jackson died STONEWALL JACKSON just a few

Jack Kirby

Jack Kirby never profited from Marvel's success. Not only was he overshadowed by the more media- friendly Stan Lee, but Kirby's A contributions were work for hire, so he never got proper payment or credit for со- creating the Marvel Universe. CRACKED.COM

El Greco

El Greco was snubbed for dissing Michelangelo. Doménikos Theotokópoulos (El Greco) had the chutzpah to dismiss the great masters. Because of his contrariness, his paintings weren't appreciated as masterpieces until the 19th century, 250 years after his death. CRACKED.COM

Mark Twain and Nikola Tesla

CRACKED MARK TWAIN AND NIKOLA TESLA Twain and Tesla were friends who got together in 1895. Tesla asked Twain to come to his lab and took a picture of him, which was published in a magazine. Twain was really interested in electricity and wrote about it in one of his books.

Ray Kroc and Walt Disney

CRACKED RAY KROC AND WALT DISNEY McD's founder Ray Kroc and Walt Disney were both in the Red Cross Ambulance Corps during WWI. Kroc thought Walt, nicknamed Diz, was a bit of an oddball: Whenever we went into town to chase girls, he stayed in camp drawing pictures.

Dali and Freud

CRACKED ERE UTE-MONTPARK PARNASSE 24 RUE DE LA GAITE N 1934 ous LES SOIRS ndredi 15 au Jeudi 21 heures MATINEE 2 Dimanche 17 juln. a 14h 48 LA pour les REPRESENTATIONS du CEL S D' RAND-RI GP la de UROQUEBOL SALVADOR DALÍ AND SIGMUND FREUD In 1938, Salvador Dalí and Sigmund Freud got together in London and Dalí drew a picture of Freud. Freud commented that Dalí looked like a fanatic. Dalí liked that.

William Shakespeare

William Shakespeare CRACKED.COM Shakespeare left the bulk of his estate to his eldest daughter but left his second best bed to his wife. Sounds weird, but this was common practice for the time, with children receiving the best of the furniture.

Napoleon

Napoleon Bonaparte CRACKED.COM In his very detailed will, he requested that his hair be preserved and made into several bracelets with a little gold clasp for his friends and family.

Harry Houdini

Harry Houdíni CRACKED COM Before he died, the magician and his wife created a secret way to communicate to test whether seances were real. After his death, his wife held unsuccessful seances for a decade.

Ed Headrick

Frisbee Creator Ed Headrick WORLD WORLD CLASS CHAMPIONS FLYING DISC 165 G. CRACKED.COM Per his request, Headrick's ashes were molded into frisbees and given to his family and friends.

Dr. Seuss

Dr. Seuss was a beloved children's author. And he didn't like children. Theodor Geisel, who wrote under the pen name Dr. Seuss, not only never liked children, but was actually scared of them. Не never had children of his own, and according to his widow, the reason he didn't like them was that he never knew what their weird child brains would make them do next. Не ventured into children's stories when his publisher tasked him with writing a book even first graders couldn't put down, using a vocabulary of just 250 words. CRACKED.COM http://www.pbs.org/independentlens/politicaldrseuss/film.html

Che Guevara

Che Guevara is seen as a revolutionary hero. Не was actually kind of a racist. Che sauntered into Africa after the assassination of Congolese independence leader Patrice Lumumba. Using the political tragedy as a rallying point, he tried (and failed) to launch a people's revolution. Instead of working with rebel leaders, he charged in with a bunch of his own Cuban mercenaries. According to Che's Congo diaries, he had no faith in the Congolese people's ability to learn how to operate guns, and called them preposterous liars. CRACKED.COM http://reason.com/archives/2002/06/01/ches-secret-diary

Jimmy Carter

Jimmy Carter is known as a president and humanitarian. But he's also laughed in the face of nuclear fallout. When President Carter was a Navy Lieutenant, he led a containment team of 24 men into the Chalk River Laboratories nuclear research facility after a reactor accident released 4,500 tons of radioactive water into the building's basement. Не and his team spent rotating 90-second shifts doing cleanup and repairs right next to the malfunctioning reactor. Carter would later write that he absorbed so much radiation that his pee was actually radioactive for six months following the incident. CRACKED.COM Jimmy Carter, 1996

John Wayne

John Wayne is Hollywood's most famous cowboy. But he absolutely hated riding horseback. Wayne had learned to ride when he was young, so by the time he started making cowboy pictures, he was already fed up with it. In the book John Wayne: The Man Behind the Myth, Wayne is quoted as saying, I still hate riding horses. I go by truck everywhere I can. Another thing Wayne hated was hippies, for ducking the Vietnam draft... even though he himself got out of going to World War II so he could make more cowboy movies. CRACKED.COM Michael Munn, 2005. John

Leo Fender

Leo Fender is a legend who perfected the electric guitar. But he couldn't play, and didn't like rock'n'roll. Despite the fact that his entire business revolved around manufacturing and constantly improving guitars and amps, Fender never actually got around to learning how to play them and didn't have any interest in doing so. When Fender was testing an amp with a guitar, other people in the shop had to go in and tune the instrument when they couldn't take the noise anymore. Yet his creations are the guitar of choice for legends such as Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix. CRACKED.COM

Leonardo da Vinci

Leonardo da Vinci fought for animal welfare. Leonardo had a habit of buying caged birds at the marketplace just to release them. Не was furious about the fact that humans raise animals just to slaughter them, and apparently refused to eat meat. CRACKED.COM

Galileo

GALILEO WAS A PRACTICING ASTROLOGER We think of Galileo as a brilliant scientific mind, but in his time, he was also a well-regarded astrol- oger famous for his horoscopes and predictions. CRACKED COM

Beate Sirota Gordon

CRACKED.COM Beate Sirota Gordon secretly introduced equal rights and women's civil rights to post-WWII Japan - and got away with it. As a part of the subcommittee tasked to write Japan's new constitution, she included a few articles that denounced gender and racial discrimination without telling anyone about it, altering Japan's civil rights forever.

Flossie Wong-Staal

CRACKED COM Flossie Wong-Staal became the first researcher to successfully clone and map HIV. Her work paved the way for the development of HIV blood tests.

Eta Wrobel

CRACKED COM Eta Wrobel escaped from a concentration camp into the woods, in 1942. Once there, she helped organize an 80-person resistance group that directly hindered German movement and cut off supply routes. She personally constructed and set mines, and even performed field surgery on herself with a knife.

Mary Seacole

AFTER BEING REJECTED FROM JOINING FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE'S NURSE GROUP, MOST LIKELY BECAUSE OF THE COLOR OF HER SKIN... Mary Seacole decided to go to the Crimean War front herself, and funded her own hospital with her own money. SHE WOULD ALSO WORK ON THE BATTLEFIELD ITSELF--A PLACE NIGHTINGALE NEVER VENTURED. CRACKED.COM

Huda Sha’arawi

Huda Sha'arawi was a pioneer in feminist activism. She was the first Egyptian woman to found a philanthropic society, opened a school for girls, organized lectures, and founded the Egyptian Feminist Union, which still operates today. She began a movement to end the requirement that women wear veils by removing hers in public in Cairo. CRACKED.COM

Zura Karuhimbi

Zura Karuhimbi saved more than 100 people during the Rwandan genocide, using her reputation as a witch to scare killers away. Whenever a militia neared her house, where she'd hidden would-be victims, she would shake her bracelets and threaten to curse them and their families. She would even touch them with a skin-irritating herb. They avoided her house. GRAGKED.COM

Heinrich Goebel

This is (pictured: not Goebel's actual light bulb.) Heinrich Goebel, inventor of the light bulb. Goebel tried to sell his invention to this man, Thomas Edison. Edison turned him away, saying he saw no use in it. Soon after, Goebel died, and Edison bought the patent from Goebel's wife for a fraction of its value. CRACKED COM http://www.gizmohighway.com/history/light_bulb.htm

Elisha Gray

This is Elisha Gray, inventor of the 5 variable resistance telephone. cross the bottom of A box B ). G piece was Hello to the of the The were w which Before variable resistance, voices transmitted via the water reviel V telephone line were garbled, now water also was Alexander Graham Bell the made as in the ram (Jig 1). bribed a patent officer into the boket named Zenas Wilber murina to keep the of the voice was long planed me an eye out for patent ble from-S- which applications related to the ... talked into the telephone. When Gray's

Henri Poincare

+ax =x Henri Poincaré was the foremost expert on relativity in the late 19th century and was a most likely the first person to formally present the 2 theory of 1200111+ 120 relativity. To.ad Despite having read his work, Albert Einstein does not cite Poincaré at all. CRACKED.COM adx Vely 1200

Valentina Tereshkova

Sally Ride wasn't the first woman in space. That distinction belongs to Russian cosmonaut Valentina Tereshkova. In 1963, when Ride was just 12 years old, NASA Tereshkova was already taking laps around the Earth aboard the Vostok 6. And by the time she finally hung up her spacesuit, CHALLENGER Tereshkova had racked up more time in space than all United States astronauts combined. CRACKED.COM http://www.astronaubx

Ub Iwerks

Ub Iwerks was the creator of Mickey Mouse. And he animated Steamboat Willie. Walt Disney said Iwerks remained virtually unknown because he was too shy to promote himself. CRACKED.COM

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