40 Quotes From Famous Folks That’ll Get You Laughing, Crying, Thinking or Rolling Your Eyes With Utter Contempt

You’ll laugh with someone, at someone and learn a thing or two along the way
40 Quotes From Famous Folks That’ll Get You Laughing, Crying, Thinking or Rolling Your Eyes With Utter Contempt

This list of random quotes is about to give you all the feels — and not in the original sappy sense of the term either. We mean that it will quite literally allow you to experience every feeling imaginable. There’s a little something to make you angry, afraid, sad, happy, disgusted and surprised, while also somehow giving you levels of enjoyment that will no doubt peak with audible laughter throughout. 

After the emotional roller-coaster ride comes to an end, please remember that we didn’t say any of these things. Take it up with the quoter, and don’t cry on the messenger.

The Shining

THE SHINING Here's Johnny! 01/ You may know it's a reference to The Johnny Carson Show, but Stanley Kubrick didn't. He'd lived in England for 20 yea

Bruce Cockburn

Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight. Got to kick at the darkness until it bleeds daylight. Bruce Cockburn Singer/ songwriter Love

The Warriors

THE WARRIORS Warriors! Come out to play! The director alley-ooped the line to David Patrick Kelly on the spot, and Kelly delivered it like a weirdo

Zoolander

ZOOLANDER But why male models? After David Duchovny delivers his monologue about male models making the best assassins, Ben Stiller actually forgot

Rocky IV

CRACKED What I'm trying to say is, if I can change, and you can change, EVERYBODY CAN CHANGE! Rocky Balboa, Rocky IV

Dumb and Dumber

DUMB AND DUMBER Don't worry, we'll catch our break, too. Producers wanted Harry and Lloyd to get on the bus with the bikini babes at the end, but Ji

Casablanca

CASABLANCA Here's looking at you, kid. Humphrey Bogart would teach poker to Ingrid Bergman between takes, and this was just a common line he'd tease

Adventure Time

Sucking at something is the first step to becoming sorta good at something. - Jake the dog from His Hero episode of Adventure Time (written by: Kent

Rodney Dangerfield

Rodney Dangerfield CRACKED.COM Is Rodney still king of the one-liner? When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father, I'm very sorry. We did everything we could...but he pulled through.

Source

Chris Gethard

CHRIS GETHARD I didn't know when I was 11 years old that this thing had a name: Depression. I just thought everybody in fifth grade had an internal monologue like the guy from Taxi Driver. CRACKED

Source: Chris Gethard ‘Career Suicide’ on HBO

Good Will Hunting

40 Quotes From Famous Folks That’ll Get You Laughing, Crying, Thinking or Rolling Your Eyes With Utter Contempt

Groundskeeper Willie

A famous SIMPSONS line was CO- co-opted by American right-wing media during the 2003 Iraq war. CHEESE-EATING MONKEY became a go-to insult towards the

The Dalai Lama

CRACKEDCOR if someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it would be reasonable to shoot back with your own gun. -His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Titanic

TITANIC I'm the king of the world! Leo shouted this when he first boarded the ship, and James Cameron chucked it in the script.

Jessica Simpson

Jessica Simpson isn't quite sure what tuna is: CRACKED COM Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it sayS 'Chicken of the Sea'?

Betty White

Betty White on taking a pounding: Why do people say, 'Grow some balls'? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you really wanna get tough, grow a vagina. Those things really take a pounding! CRACKED

Disney Platform Distribution

GoldDerby

Jaws

JAWS You're gonna need a bigger boat. This line was a big inside joke on set. The producers were too cheap to build a bigger boat, so boat size was

Leonardo Da Vinci

He who does not punish evil commands it to be done Leonardo Da Vinci

Craig T. Nelson

Craig T. Nelson lifted himself up by his bootstraps: CRACKEDCO I've been on foodstamps and welfare. Anybody help me out? No.

Midnight Cowboy

MIDNIGHT COWBOY I'm walking here! The film was SO low-budget that they shot this scene with a hidden camera. Everyone you see is an authentic pissed

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian goes fishing for compliments, catches backlash: 8 CRACKED COM You guys, I'm not that skinny! I'm down to 119 pounds. I will say when take out my hair extensions I am less.

Cameron Diaz

Cameron Diaz fancies herself a bit of a prodigy: CRACKED COM I've been noticing gravity since was very young.

Machiavelli

Machiavelli's famous quote: The ends justifies the means, is nowhere what he near actually wrote: When there is no impartial arbiter, one must cons

Joe Dirt

JOEDIRT In the film, Joe searches for his parents who abandoned him as a child. With one beautiful quote, he sums up his character's journey. You gott

Forrest Gump

My mama always said, 'Life was like a box of chocolates. Forrest Gump People don't realize that this is a sweetened version of a more negative quote

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