10 Pairs of Famous Twins I Think We Can Admit Are At Least Mildly Freaky

You’re telling me you happily live in a house sold to you by doppelgangers? Don’t come running to me when your child is replaced with a changeling that burns when it touches iron. You just know there’s a false wall in every house they sell, and they’re in there, feeling your energy with their palms.

Not to kick a man when he’s down after being passed over as a VP pick, but he’s a damn astronaut, so I doubt a comedy article on the internet is going to bother him when g-forces don’t. All I’m going to say is that sending twins into space seems ripe for secret experiments. They’re probably launching a covert satellite to allow the world’s twins to telepathically communicate more easily.

Look, I loved “you got it, dude!” as much as you did. Now, though, they seem to have possibly stopped aging entirely, and are making me wonder if when we thought they were six months old, they’d actually been around for six centuries. The blue eyes don’t help. Those things look like they’ve watched multiple empires fall.

It’s like a billionaire had a clone made to harvest organs from but couldn’t bring himself to gut it.

The existence of Good Charlotte implies that, in some other timeline, there is a thoroughly evil pair of Madden twins known as Bad Charlotte.

You can’t be seven feet tall and twins. Are you kidding me? That’s an unfeasible amount of flesh for one human to produce. If they were born in ancient times, people would have assumed one of them was meant to carry the sun, and the other, the moon.

Another combination of physical power and duplication I don’t care for. Do you know how strong you have to be and how high of a pain tolerance you have to have to become an NFL player? You’re not supposed to make two of those. If they weren’t in the NFL, they’d be guarding the gates of some ancient ziggurat.

They may not be outwardly identical, but they do have a matching, pulsing ball of ichor where the human heart is supposed to be.

I mean, yeah. These guys were actually genuinely terrifying. At least the Kochs had the decorum to hide their butchery behind the closed doors of the American legislative process.

Twin or not, nobody should be sucking on a wolf titty. That’s just weird.