12 All-Star Bits of Trivia We’ve Convinced to Band Together Into One Indomitable Trivial Supergroup

The town of Longyearbyen is so cold, bodies won’t decompose, and instead act as perfect cryogenic freezers for diseases. Scientists were able to find live samples of the 1918 flu virus in local corpses — in 1998. The local mining community passed a law in 1950 requiring terminally ill people to go do their dying back in mainland Norway.

Much like the first level of any good video game is designed to get you used to the controllers, these games came preloaded to teach users how to interface with the personal computer. Minesweeper teaches you point and click with a mouse, and Solitaire teaches accurate drag-and-drop technique. 3D Pinball: Space Cadet was ostensibly there to teach you heartbreak.

A study of 33 surgeons found that the nine dweebs who played three or more hours of video games per week screwed up 37 percent less often and worked 27 percent faster than their more boring colleagues.

It was in an article in the Sunday World-Herald titled “Fat Pat to Rassle Savage Because the Public Wants It,” about wrestlers “Fat” Pat McGill and Steve Savage taking each other on. The columnist claimed that the promoter was “swamped by phone calls,” and in an apparent attempt to fend off the naysayers, said, “It is so, you liar, liar, pants on fire; there were several people who called up.” It’s likely that it was already in the zeitgeist, but no one has been able to trace it any further than that.

Cheese is really just evil milk, when you get right down to it. If it’s not processed properly, you can consume some of the grosser byproducts, and suffer from tyrotoxism — aka dairy poisoning.

Alarmingly, spider legs are like eight hideous boners. They’re powered by blood pressure, instead of muscles, which accounts for a few core spider traits: their unnatural-looking movement that creeps us out deep within our lizard brains, some species’ ability to jump unbelievable distances and the fact that their legs curl up when they die and their blood pressure hits zero.

In a law championed by professional dildo Ted Cruz, you can’t legally own more than six “obscene devices,” defined as “a dildo or artificial vagina, designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs.” I doubt Johnny Law would find my baker’s dozen of ALF fleshlights particularly “stimulating” to “human” genitals, so I should be safe.

English firefighters responded to a blaze on a farm, saving 18 piglets. Six months later, the farmer sent them a bunch of sausages made from those exact piglets. They were all pretty psyched, and had a barbecue ASAP, posting on Facebook: “We got to sample the fruits of our labors from that February night.”

The first-ever cell phone call was made by Motorola employee Marty Cooper, to a nemesis of his at AT&T, to rub his accomplishment in their filthy face. Petty, elegant, brilliant. Steve Jobs’ first call using an iPhone was to prank a random Starbucks employee: “Yes, I’d like to order 4,000 lattes to go, please. No, just kidding. Wrong number. Goodbye!” What a dweeb.

Researchers found that adding components extracted from root vegetables like carrots can improve cement flexibility, and can increase strength by up to 80 percent. This would also require significantly less cement, which would have a huge impact on carbon emissions.

Forty-two of 266 Popes are believed to have met violent ends. Almost all of the first 30 or so were killed, when it was still a startup religion with a lot of powerful enemies. A few have been strangled, one was smothered with a pillow and one guy got caught plowing a married woman and was killed by her husband.

It’s estimated that while American children make up about 3.7 percent of all kids on the planet, they own 47 percent of toys and kids’ media.