5 Sitcom Characters Who Went (Mostly) Unseen
The phrase “better seen and not heard” may apply to obnoxious children, but the opposite is true for classic sitcom characters who are somehow heard but never seen. It’s a surprisingly durable trope, showing up in some of the biggest sitcoms of all time. Here are five unforgettable characters who made multiple sitcom appearances while never actually, well, appearing…
George Steinbrenner in ‘Seinfeld’
Like some other characters on this list, we catch glimpses of George Costanza’s boss, but only the back of a head or the suggestion of a shoulder. Larry David voiced the blowhard baseball owner in 12 episodes over five seasons, making Steinbrenner one of Seinfeld’s most repeated characters. The real George Steinbrenner was flattered despite David’s bluster and filmed a cameo that would have aired in the Season Seven finale. But when he found out he’d be in the same episode in which the show killed off Costanza’s fiancee, Susan, he insisted they cut out his part.
Mrs. Wolowitz in ‘Big Bang Theory’
Based on the horrific sound of her shrieking voice, it’s probably a good thing we never got a good glimpse of Howard’s overbearing mother on Big Bang Theory. You can put a mental picture together from the way other characters talk about her — obese with a mustache, spilling out of her shrunken girdle like the Pillsbury Doughboy. According to Howard, her neck size is 43 inches.
As the series went on, Big Bang gave us glimpses of Mrs. Wolowitz — the top of her head, hands pulling Raj through a window — but we never get to see her face.
Vera in ‘Cheers’
Norm’s long-suffering and never-seen wife was a great vehicle for barroom punchlines.
COACH: There’s a cold one waiting for you.
NORM: I know. If she calls, I’m not here.
NORM: (Owning a home) is a big responsibility. You got lawns to mow. You got plumbing to fix. You got gutters to clean. Then every couple of years, you got to paint the entire thing from top to bottom. Honestly, I don’t know where Vera gets the energy.
NORM: (On the phone) Vera? Yes, yes, I know it’s late. You see, we’re being held hostage by a mad gunman, and… (Pause) What do you mean I’ve used that one before?
Maris in ‘Frasier’
Niles Crane’s first wife was a powerful presence, even if we never laid eyes on her. Even so, it’s not hard to paint a mental picture of this extremely thin, frail and pale woman.
How pale? At one point, Martin Crane describes her to a police dispatcher as “very, very Caucasian.”
How pale? Frasier once said lack of pigmentation would cause Maris to sear like an ahi tuna if she remained in the sun for more than three minutes.
How pale? She was also described as “like the sun but without the warmth.”
Ugly Naked Guy in ‘Friends’
Ugly Naked Guy used to be cute, according to Phoebe, but then in the tradition of many unseen sitcom characters, he gained an uncomfortable amount of weight. The Friends gang had an unhealthy obsession with peeking into the nudist’s apartment window, especially when he was in a compromising position like removing a turkey from the oven or laying kitchen tile. Who’s the real villain here?
When Ugly Naked Guy finally gives up his apartment, the Friends vie for the prime space. (It’s our only chance to get a glimpse of his Ugly Naked Shoulder.) Ross wins the lease by bonding with the original occupant over lack of clothing.
JOEY: Hey, check it out! Ugly Naked Guy has a naked friend!
RACHEL: Oh my God! That is our friend! It’s Naked Ross!
