The Weirdly Convincing Theory That ‘Cheers’ and ‘Frasier’ Are All a ‘Star Trek’ Simulation

You’ll never look at Frasier Crane the same way again
The Weirdly Convincing Theory That ‘Cheers’ and ‘Frasier’ Are All a ‘Star Trek’ Simulation

The Star Trek universe obviously includes a vast number of TV shows, feature films and self-serving William Shatner vanity projects. Also, according to some fans, the Trek canon includes Cheers and Frasier (and, to a lesser extent, The John Larroquette Show and Wings).

How could this be true, you might ask? Well, it’s because both of those classic sitcoms are really just part of an elaborate Holodeck program that exists within the reality Star Trek. The Holodeck, of course, being the sophisticated environment simulator of the future that routinely breaks down and turns into a death trap.

Sure, this probably sounds like the ramblings of a sentient TV Guide that’s been experimenting with peyote, but a number of folks have floated this bizarre theory over the years, and it’s oddly convincing.

The basis for this theory is the fact that Cheers and Star Trek shared several actors, including Kirstie Alley, who played both Cheers manager Rebecca Howe and Lt. Saavik in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. And Kate Mulgrew, who portrayed Captain Janeway in Star Trek: Voyager appeared as a city councilwoman who dates Sam Malone in a Cheers two-parter.

But what if that wasn’t really a local Boston politician? What if it was Captain Janeway, and she was just looking to unwind for a few hours in Starfleet’s standard issue holographic playground? Cheers being a Holodeck program makes a lot of sense, considering that we’ve seen crew members create artificial watering holes before. 

This theory would also explain why Data (Brent Spiner) popped by Cheers for a beer one time, possibly because he was sick of pretending to be Sherlock Holmes, and just wanted to spend his Holodeck time being grilled by a pretentious server. 

As for “Frasier Crane,” well, he was really just Captain Morgan Bateson of the USS Bozeman. As we see in one episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, Captain Bateson’s ship was caught in a time loop and thrust into the 24th century. 

So, perhaps the reason why “Frasier” spends so much time at Cheers is because Captain Bateson is desperately looking for an escape after having trouble adjusting to life in the future. And he kept his Holodeck program going for so long, he gave up on Cheers and continued the narrative in a computer recreation of Seattle in the 20th century.

At one point, Bateson seemingly invited Captain Picard to join him for an evening of farcical misunderstandings and holographic homoeroticism.

How exactly some random alien doctor, who once tried to hook up with Commander Riker, became Bateson’s Holodeck wife, and eventual ex-wife, Lilith is less clear.

Clearly, Captain Bateson is still in the Holodeck. Hopefully someone will finally cure his holo-addiction once and for all. 

You (yes, you) should follow JM on Twitter (if it still exists by the time you’re reading this).

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