David Letterman’s ‘Late Night’ Trick or Treaters Once Included Unknowns Lindsay Lohan and Macaulay Culkin
In the days of Peak Letterman, an annual tradition was a trip to Dave’s house to see what the kids were wearing for Halloween that year. The costume jokes hold up remarkably well, as does Letterman’s ability to cast trick-or-treaters. In two different years, he managed to welcome pre-fame (and prepubescent) Lindsay Lohan and Macaulay Culkin.
First up in 1989, a not-yet Home Alone Culkin rang Letterman’s bell in search of some holiday candy. Culkin’s costume? He’s the piping-hot half of a McDLT, McDonalds’ ill-advised attempt at sandwich innovation.
“You want fries with that?” the kids ask Letterman, who declines. But he’s got something special for the trick-or-treaters: “Lovely shower caps.”
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Five-year-old Lohan showed up a few years later in 1992. Her adorable outfit “is a favorite with New York City kids,” Letterman says. “This costume is Stuff Found on the Floor of the D Train.”
Letterman asks little Lindsay what treat she’s hoping for. She answers “gum,” but Dave’s all out. Instead, he sends her on her way with 40 feet of garden hose. “You’ll have fun in the yard with that.”
Considering that both the 1989 and 1992 segments are more than 30 years in the rear-view mirror, a number of the costume jokes still deliver. Other kids who rang Dave’s doorbell back in the day? He gave a bottle of contact lens solution to a tyke dressed as America’s favorite meat snack, the Slim Jim:
Handed out a garlic press to a boy pretending to be Person Receiving the Heimlich Maneuver:
Served up some clams to Gum Stuck to the Bottom of a Chair:
Slapped a Sen. Paul Tsongas bumper sticker on the costume that screams mid-November, a Rotting Jack O’Lantern:
Introduced Red Man chewing tobacco to a girl dressed as a Stun Gun:
And provided a $25 gift certificate for litigation services to a boy dressed as a Men’s Restroom Key:
Not all the kids became child stars like Lohan and Culkin, but Letterman made sure they left with treats they’d remember for the rest of their lives.