81 Scorching Burns to Light the Candles on Chevy Chase’s 81st Birthday Cake

Happy birthday, Chevy, from all your friends and coworkers
81 Scorching Burns to Light the Candles on Chevy Chase’s 81st Birthday Cake

What can we say about Chevy Chase on his 81st birthday that we haven’t already said before? 

Here’s the good news: We don’t have to say it. After decades of burning down every bridge in sight, it was no problem to find 81 burns to light the candles on his cake. Below is a birthday portrait of the man of the hour, courtesy of the co-workers, directors and other unfortunates who’ve worked with Chase over the years. 

John Carpenter

Director Kevin Smith

“Chevy went on to claim he invented every funny thing that ever happened in the history of not just comedy, but also the known world.” 
(Silent Bob Speaks)

Paul Mooney

“Chevy Chase was the doll-baby ... the darling of the discotheque with straight teeth, and Richard (Pryor) wanted to knock them out.” 
(Becoming Richard Pryor)

Richard Belzer

“When Chevy was a little boy, he used to masturbate a lot. And one day, his father caught him masturbating and said, ‘You keep doing that, and someday you’re going to be starring in Fletch Lives.’” 
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase)

Amy Heckerling, Director of ‘National Lampoon’s European Vacation’

“There were times when Chevy didn’t show up. He was not a happy camper. And neither was I.”
(Flavorwire)

More Amy Heckerling

“I couldn’t go on the set unless I knew I had in my hand a physical ticket to New York, so that I could just go at any time. I had to hold it in my hand so I knew that I had a way out.”

‘Entertainment Weekly’ Review of ‘The Chevy Chase Show’

“Vomit, nose-picking, belches, gerbil-filled underpants — does Chevy Chase have your attention yet?” 

Pete Davidson

“He’s a fucking douchebag. Fuck Chevy Chase. I hate that dude. He’s just a genuinely bad, racist person.” 
(Deadline)

Donald Glover

“I just saw Chevy as fighting time — an artist has to be okay with his reign being over.” 
(The New Yorker)

Roger Ebert’s Review of ‘Cops and Robbersons’

“The Chevy Chase character, is a particularly painful case. I don’t know how to put this any other way, so I’ll be forthright: If you met Norman Robberson in everyday life, you would assume, after talking to him for a minute or two, that he was mentally retarded.”
(RogerEbert.com) 

Johnny Carson

“He couldn’t ad-lib a fart at a bean-eating contest.” 
(Tom Shales at RogerEbert.com)

Stephen Colbert

“Who am I to attack Chevy Chase? I don’t know Chevy Chase. I have never met Mr. Chase. Actually, I’m uncomfortable calling him Chevy. The only thing I think of when I look at this man is, ‘There but for the grace of God, go I.’” 
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase)

More Terry Sweeney

“He acted horribly to me. He acted horribly to everyone.” 

Joel McHale on a Chase-less ‘Community’ movie

“It really is like a family reunion but without a-holes.” 
(The Wrap)

Yvette Nicole Brown

“Maybe he comes from a generation where he could say things like that and no one would ever say anything back to him.” 
(The Daily Beast)

Alison Brie

“At a certain point you’ve got to just laugh it off, because Chevy’s Chevy.” 
(The Daily Beast)

More Donald Glover

“I know there’s a human in there somewhere — he’s almost too human.” 
(Hollywood Reporter)

Greg Giraldo

“Chevy is a comedy icon, and living proof that you could actually snort the funniness right out of yourself.” 
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase)

Howard Stern

“(Chevy Chase) had a reputation for being funny. He left Saturday Night Live, he went to do movies, and all of his movies suck. They all suck. Every movie he does sucks.”
(The Things)

Writer Tony Hendra After Chase Tried Out For — And Got Cast In — ‘National Lampoon’s Lemmings’

“It was one of the worst comedic auditions I’d ever seen.” 
(Going Too Far)

‘Vulture'

“Pierce Hawthorne (was) a character that was as out-of-step and bigoted, sexist and homophobic as Chevy Chase has at times proven himself to be.” 

Director Chris Columbus

“To be completely honest, Chevy treated me like dirt.” 
(Yahoo!)

More Joel McHale

“(Working with Chase) wasn’t fun. I got in trouble one time because I injured him. I dislocated his shoulder.” 
(A.V. Club)

Reggie Watts

“Chevy Chase was terrible. … He’s an asshole.” 
(Cracked)

Al Franken

“Chevy is a great sport about it. No one laughed harder than Chevy when the town of Chevy Chase, Maryland tried to change its name to Not Funny, Maryland.” 
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase)

Harold Ramis

“I take (Chevy) away from the set, but not so far that everyone won’t hear us. This is my opportunity. The whole crew can hear. I say, ‘You fucking asshole, everyone’s been out here all day. The crew’s been out here longer than you have. They’ve been here since six in the morning. We’re all tired, and we’re all hot, so if you can’t control yourself, why don’t you…’ Blah, blah, blah. So the crew is ready to applaud me.” 
(Sick in the Head: Conversations About Life and Comedy) 

‘Community’ Writer Dino Stamatopoulos

“He has a reputation for being a dick. That reputation is earned.” 
(WTF with Marc Maron)

John Carpenter, Director of ‘Memoirs of An Invisible Man’

“Burn in hell for all eternity.” 
(Toronto Film Magazine)

John Carpenter, Still Mad

“I really wanted to quit the business after that movie.”

More from ‘Entertainment Weekly's review of ‘The Chevy Chase Show’

“To truly understand the tedium Chase has achieved, you have to catch him these days, now that the show has settled into a mind-deadening, Chevy-centric rut.”  

‘Uproxx' Review of ‘The Chevy Chase Show’

“Chase never looked anything resembling comfortable. He always seemed as though he’d rather be anywhere else but on your television, and quickly, viewers came to feel the same way.” 

‘Vulture’ Review of ‘The Chevy Chase Show’

“Chase seemed to be sending a message, whether he knew it or not, that he was giving up, and punished the audience as a result.” 

John Carpenter, Madder Than Ever

“He shall not be named who needs to be killed. No, no, no, that’s terrible. He needs to be set on fire.” 

Alan Zweibel Again

“I remember Chevy coming back after one of his specials and talking about it or raving about it, you know, proud of something he just did, and I remember Al Franken saying something like, ‘That’s good, Chevy, but we do one of those every week.’” 
(Live From New York: The Complete Uncensored History of Saturday Night Live)

Roger Ebert’s Review of ‘The Three Amigos’

“Chase hardly seems in the movie at all.” 
(RogerEbert.com)

Roger Ebert’s Review of ‘Fletch Lives’

“When Chase bothers to actually play a character, he can be very effective. But sometimes he seems to be covering himself, playing detached so that nobody can blame him if the comedy doesn’t work.” 
(RogerEbert.com)

Roger Ebert’s Review of ‘Oh Heavenly Dog’

“Among the great, unrecorded conversations in Hollywood history, we must now include the one in which Chevy Chase’s agent convinced him that playing Benji would be the right career move.” 
(RogerEbert.com)

Marc Maron

“I heard you mentioning over there, ‘Who the hell are these guys? I’m being roasted by nobodies. How can it be funny?’ At least I’m a nobody at the beginning of my career.”
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase)

Joel McHale on a ‘Community’ Reunion

“I don’t think he’s allowed to return.” 

More Dan Aykroyd

“Chevy Chase is Hollywood’s foremost brownnoser and locker suck. For the lead role in Caddyshack, he blew Jon Peters’ pet pit bull. And even though Peters had nothing to do with Fletch, Chevy went back and blew the same dog because he enjoyed it so much the first time.” 
(The New York Friars Club Book of Roasts)

Tony Hendra

“Chase was more interested in being a star than in being a satirist.” 
(Going Too Far)

More Al Franken

“I think a serious contribution that Chevy has made to our society is to show people how to deal with a chemical dependency problem.” 
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase)

Rob Huebel

“I went up to him and I was like, ‘Chevy, I just want to say I’m a big fan. ‘I’m Rob Huebel.’ And Chevy just hauled off and slapped me across the face so hard. I saw red. He made a joke, like, ‘Can’t you see I’m talking to somebody, kid?’” 
(Late Night with Seth Meyers)

Donald Glover Again

“Lena (Dunham) is using the N-word extremely liberal with me. Who does she think she is, Chevy Chase?” (He was joking about the Dunham part) 
(New York Post)

More Reggie Watts

“He probably was better when he was younger, and I think he might even be on the spectrum. You know, spectrum mixed with a lot of fame and success insulates you from identifying issues and improving them. And so over time, it just got worse. He became much more of a dick as he got older.” 
(Cracked)

Dino Stamatopoulos Again

“I view him now as a confused old man who can’t really hurt me in any way. I understand why the regulars on Community and the full-time writers hating him. If he wasted my time as much as much as he wasted their time, I’d hate him, too.” 
(WTF with Marc Maron)

More Howard Stern

“Lazy, fat and stupid.” 
(The Things)

Joel McHale One Last Time

“I was like, ‘Hi, I’m Joel.’ And (Chevy) was like, ‘Mmm-hmmm.’ As if to say, ‘You know who I am.’” 

Paul Shaffer

“Chevy, tonight it’s all about love. You made us laugh so much, and then inexplicably stopped in about 1978.” 
(Comedy Central Roast of Chevy Chase) 

Dan Harmon

“Fuck you, Chevy.”

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