Historical Figures With Historically Big Naturals
Throughout history, women have had few opportunities to make significant contributions to society. They fought long and hard to be seen as anything other than wives, mothers or sex objects. But some of them were also lugging around serious mommy milkers, and we can acknowledge that and their accomplishments at the same time. That’s called feminism.
Dolley Madison
It seems like every biography of the founding fathers has to mention that President James Madison’s wife was dragging around a dairy farm. She scandalized Washington with the low-cut dresses she adopted after liberating herself from her religious upbringing, and honestly, go, girl.
Mrs. Pack
Mrs. Pack is considered the mother of the British nanny, especially the stereotype of British nanny boobs. In 1689, it was looking like Queen Mary II’s infant nephew, the Duke of Gloucester, would inherit the throne, but Princess Anne wasn’t producing enough milk for him, so they searched across the land for the woman with the most athletic ducts. They found Mrs. Pack, whose squirters were so pendulous that the Duke’s father demanded she feed his son at once. She became so important to the future of the monarchy that she was arguably the real queen, wielding immense power over the royal family. All because of some extra-large hefty bags.
Genevieve Poitrine
Genevieve Poitrine, on the other hand, didn’t get quite so lucky. She became the wet nurse for the dauphin of France in 1781 thanks to her “large breasts” and “rustic looks” that “contrasted with the ‘obsequious urbanity’ of the courtiers” — in other words, she was an amusing sight for Marie Antoinette and the rest of her skinny bitches — but she’s believed to have been responsible for transmitting the tuberculosis that killed the young prince. By then, she’d cut and run, so technically she made out okay.
Incidentally, poitrine means “titties” in French. Her name was literally “boob woman.”
Queen Victoria
For as much of a prude as she was, Queen Victoria could have really rocked a halter top. With a 66-inch bust, she was wider than she was tall. Within two generations of passing down big rig genes, her grandson married Mary of Teck, ensuring the future boobaliciousness of the British royal family. Speaking of whom…
Queen Elizabeth II
We don’t wanna disrespect the recently deceased, and we have nothing but respect for Queen Elizabeth II’s crown jewels, even if she was a filthy colonizer. Details are scarce because we’re pretty sure you get thrown in the Tower of London for acknowledging the queen’s breasts, but you only have to peruse pictures of Elizabeth in her youth to see that she was packing heat. Even The Crown couldn’t avoid commenting on her “milkmaid”-size rack.
When you make Emmy darlings get dirty, you know you’ve got the heavies.
