Norm Macdonald and David Spade Loved to Burn Each Other on Talk Shows

Conan is probably still paying FCC fines for Macdonald’s punchline
Norm Macdonald and David Spade Loved to Burn Each Other on Talk Shows

Norm Macdonald and David Spade had overlapping tenures on Saturday Night Live, with Macdonald starting in 1993 and Spade heading for other pastures in 1996. But the two remained connected over the years, performing together on Adam Sandler’s “Here Comes the Funny” tour and somehow ending up on the same talk show panels several times before Macdonald’s untimely death in 2021. Whether they were talking to Larry King, Dennis Miller or Conan O’Brien, the two comics loved to rip one another to pieces, as seen in a new YouTube compilation uploaded to the I’m Not Norm channel. Here are some of the funniest burns from the two comics’s talk show appearances over the years. 

Talking to Dennis Miller

MACDONALD: This Viagra, it's insane … I read the pill can make your cock hard for four hours. So now who has the four-hour hard cock? The impotent guys! The rest of us are fucked. Me and (Dennis) got our regular cocks. Meanwhile, fuckin’ Spade is … 

(long applause break)

MILLER: I didn't see it coming! He brought it all around and then a vicious rip-kick into his best friend's cock! 

SPADE: Once there's too much cock talk, I try to just zone out for a minute till it goes back the other way.

MACDONALD: If there's too much cock talk, this guy has sweaty fever dreams. From all the cock talk. 

SPADE: Why bury me twice? This guy is killing me.

Talking to Conan O’Brien

MACDONALD: Here's a story — Dave bought me a beautiful leather jacket that's well out of my price range. Now I'm not one to take charity …

O’BRIEN: You're doing a Mark Twain one-man show. ‘I’m not one to take charity.’

MACDONALD: I’m saying I sucked him off.

Talking to Larry King

MACDONALD: David and I apparently are having some kind of feud. 

SPADE: I didn’t pay $300 to have my hair blown dry to be treated like this. I don’t think Larry knows that Norm is a little kooky.

(After King suggests Norm rebound from SNL with a gig on Meet the Press

MACDONALD: Meet the Press would be great. Tim Russert, right?

SPADE: You guys lost me.

MACDONALD: He doesn't know about Tim Russert. He only knows supermodels.  

Talking to Howard Stern

SPADE: (Norm) is crazy!  I think you need to be kind of crazy to be really funny. Girls like him. They know when something's wrong. They pick up on it and like it. He’s a fixer-upper. 

Talking to Adam Carolla

MACDONALD (about where Spade ranks among Hollywood Romeos): I’d put him way up the list. I'd put him maybe number one in terms of sheer numbers. He knows everything that a young girl knows, like a beautiful 20-year-old. He can talk to them about Keeping Up with the Kardashians. If I try to talk to a young girl, I go, ‘You ever watch Matlock?’

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