The 5 Most Hilariously Bad Renditions of the National Anthem
No matter how gifted of a singer someone is, there’s one song that’s always a bit of a boogeyman: the national anthem of this here United States of America.
It seems like a pretty unassuming tune at first, one that somebody who hits high notes for a living wouldn’t have any issue with. For whatever reason, though, it has a propensity for turning into an absolute nightmare. Whether it’s the meandering melody, the surprisingly complicated lyrics or the fact that free-styling is frowned upon, the national anthem has taken down some heavy hitters in its time.
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Here are five of the worst…
Fergie
Fergie, known primarily for her vocal additions to the Black Eyed Peas, was tapped to sing the national anthem at the NBA All-Star Game in 2018. Given that the Black Eyed Peas discography didn’t often give her a chance to really show off her pipes, this could have been a beautiful moment for much of the nation to realize just how talented Fergie really was.
It was not.
She started out with what sounds like an attempt at a sexy, jazzy anthem, which is a bold choice to begin with, and it’s all downhill from there. The cameramen were even cruel enough to catch multiple NBA players trying to stifle laughter.
Steven Tyler
If you’re going to blow the national anthem, I’d highly recommend you don’t do it at the Indy 500. Steven Tyler bravely didn’t take this advice and delivered a performance in 2001 that was, to put it as kindly as possible, disjointed. He started off honking on his famous bobo (i.e., playing his harmonica) and did that for just long enough that people began to wonder if that was the whole thing. But no, he switched to singing, which was somehow even worse.
Honestly, if they just said they accidentally hired a Steven Tyler impersonator, this whole thing would make a lot more sense.
Dierks Bentley
I’m not particularly familiar with Dierks Bentley. Maybe I should be, given that he was introduced here as a 13-time Grammy nominated artist. Unfortunately, the next minute or two were enough to draw the validity of the entire Grammy nomination process into jeopardy. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, maybe he had a frog in his throat, or one too many big stadium beers. Still, when you also elect to go for the most straightforward possible interpretation of the national anthem, you better nail it.
Hard to say when all’s said and done that the problem existed anywhere except between lung and mouth.
Carl Lewis
Okay, honestly, I’m here to ever-so-slightly defend this one. For starters, Carl Lewis is a track star, not a professional singer. Therefore, he should receive a bit more grace. Not to mention, knowing that, he still fully went for it, and for the first half, was doing pretty well!
Unfortunately, with one particularly insane squawk during “rockets red glare” everything falls fully to shit, not helped by Lewis’ own miniature breakdown as he peppered the remainder with soundbites like “uh oh” and “I’ll make up for it now.”
Roseanne
This is a real case of, “Well, what did you think was going to happen?”
Roseanne Barr isn’t a singer. Even her general pattern of speech is far from musical. So when she was called to perform the national anthem at a 1990 San Diego Padres game, she shrugged and fired off pretty much exactly what you’d expect: an efficient, if not particularly pleasant, version of the national anthem.
Either way, I’d still rather hear this 9 times out of 10 versus the sort of insane racist nonsense she barks out whenever she gets within sniffing distance of a microphone these days.
