Here’s How Long Danny Tanner Would Have to Save His Entire Salary to Buy the Home From ‘Full House’ Today

The Tanner household from Full House in San Francisco is back on the market with an initial asking price of $6.5 million. Unless Pam passed on some hidden family fortune in her will, Danny, you don’t got it, dude.

It’s not exactly news that the going rate for homes today is closer to what 100-foot superyachts went for back in 1987 when Full House began, and, in the Tanners’ hometown of San Francisco, the problem is even worse than what the rest of the country faces on the real estate market. Everyone knows that the combination of the Silicon Valley expansion and the endless hunger of investment companies like BlackRock for new properties to exploit has created an untenable housing situation in the Bay Area, but the price tag on Tanner castle is jaw-dropping, even considering its extravagant features — I don’t think many San Francisco newscasters were living in vintage, 3,700-square foot, four-bed, three-and-a-half bath Victorians with English gardens and two-car garages even during Bob Saget’s time hosting a breakfast talk show.

For a widowed father of three to even think about moving into the Full House property’s current listing price, we estimate that he would have to spend more than a decade working at Wake Up, San Francisco without touching a cent of his salary to cover things like food and clothing just to be able to afford a down payment at the current asking price. And that’s not even factoring in Danny’s monthly payments over a 30-year mortgage — because good luck getting those freeloaders Jesse and Joey to pay rent.

Now, only the exterior shots on Full House were filmed at this classic 1900 Victorian located on 1709 Broderick Street in San Francisco — like every other TV show about a city other than Los Angeles, ABC shot Full House in the City of Angels for everything involving an actual cast. But that didn’t stop series creator Jeff Franklin from purchasing the property when it went on the market in 2020 and making it his home, though, with the recent listing, it looks like even he might be getting priced out of San Fran.

As for a morning show host’s prospects at moving into the iconic mansion, Danny would have to pull off some insane financial wizardry to make the numbers work. Right now, a down payment for a home in California is, on average, 18.2 percent of the total sales price, which means Danny would have to scrounge up $1,183,000 just to get through the door, and that’s before he locks into a 30-year mortgage with monthly payments likely around $32,700 and a $77,000 annual property tax.

According to ZipRecruiter, the range of salaries available to the average local TV news anchor starts around $50,000 and goes up into low six-figures, but let's be generous to Danny and decide that the Bay Area loves Wake Up, San Francisco so much that he’s pulling in a cool quarter-million. After federal taxes, the infamous California state income tax and the 10 percent kickback his agent gets, Danny’s take-home couldn’t be more than $117,000 annually, which, if he didn’t touch a cent of it, would get him to the down payment on his own home in a little more than a decade.

Of course, those calculations don’t factor in investments or compound interest, but they also don’t factor in the cost of being a living, human being and raising three kids on a single income in San Francisco. In reality, Danny and his daughters would be lucky to rent in a two-bedroom apartment out in Petaluma on Danny’s dime.

And even if Danny could come up with the cash to hack it in San Fran, would it even be worth the insane cost? 

As one commenter on Reddit put it, “For 6.5m Uncle Jesse better still be living in the attic.”