This Is the Time Gilbert Gottfried Bombed the Hardest

‘So I opened up with crucifixion jokes’
This Is the Time Gilbert Gottfried Bombed the Hardest

Only the late, great Gilbert Gottfried would have taken such delight in telling Howard Stern in 2007, “I’ve got a great bombing moment!” 

Given Gottfried’s penchant for stunts like telling jaw-dropping 9/11 jokes within days of 9/11, he’s probably got dozens of great bombing moments, but here’s the story he decided to share with Stern.

The first clue that Gottfried’s show wouldn’t go well? It was a corporate gig. It’s too late to pass along a note to company event planners at this point, but who hires Gilbert Gottfried for an annual meeting keynote address? (The answer: People who lose their jobs.)

“Of course, the guy says to me beforehand, ‘We have to work clean here,’’’ Gottfried told Stern. 

“Are you capable of that?” Stern asked, an entirely reasonable question. 

Of course, Gottfried replied. But then came another red flag. The company’s representative told Gottfried the group was also Christian so he needed to watch it with potentially offensive material. This was essentially daring the comic to do his worst. 

“So I opened up with crucifixion jokes,” Gottfried laughed. 

Stern, no stranger to shock himself, was aghast. “Why would you do that?”

“I don't know,” the comic confessed. But he assured the Stern staff that they would have loved this gig as the ultimate in awkward. In fact, someone from the company had to rush the podium because Gottfried refused to stop telling his offensive jokes. “A guy physically got on stage and pulled me off,” cackled the comic. 

“So you’re up there doing your act,” said Stern, trying to recreate the scene. “Is the audience booing you?” 

“They’re all staring at each other, angry,” said Gottfried with genuine glee. “They’re complaining. And this guy starts storming toward the stage.”

Stern was fascinated. “How do they eject you from the stage?” he wondered. “You say he physically grabbed you. Did he grab you by the arm? Or does he tackle you?”

A simple grab of the arm was all it took, said the 5-foot-5 Gottfried, a comic too small in stature to put up much of a fight. He also would have been laughing too hysterically to resist. 

“What do you say?” wondered Stern. “Do you say, ‘Excuse me, what are you doing up here, sir?’” 

Gottfried had a better response. “I yell out, ‘You’ve been a great crowd!’”

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