Get a Load of Chevy Chase’s 1980 ‘Playgirl’ Cover

You might want to sit down — Instagram account @retrodiaries80 has unearthed a copy of the 1980 Playgirl issue featuring comedy cover boy Chevy Chase. Va va va voom!

There’s a lot to unpack here but where to start? How about the image of bedroom-eyed Chase embracing Jane Seymour, sensuous fingers running through her luxurious locks? Kinda sexy until you remember that in 1980, Chase and Seymour were costarring in the kid flick Oh Heavenly Dog. Twentieth Century Fox made a movie with Chase and adorable dog star Benji and decided to promote it on the cover of Playgirl? No wonder it bombed.

Surely a fully clothed Chase would be a disappointment to the millions — okay, thousands — of Playgirl readers who hoped that its pages might reveal parts of Chase that weren’t ready for prime time. A bright pink graphic on the cover teases something titillating: SPECIAL MYSTERY CELEBRITY CENTERFOLD! Chase qualified as a celebrity — could the former Saturday Night Live star be the mystery man with a staple through his navel?

Alas, no. Mr. August was someone named Andy Abrams, a name that doesn’t turn up on IMDb so how much of a celebrity could he be? An eBay listing for the issue (it can be yours for $18.99!) reveals that Andy Abrams is also known as porn star Randy West, “sleek as a jungle cat and just about as wild.” Still more mystery than celebrity, if you ask me.

According to the eBay listing, Chase was interviewed in this issue of Playgirl, but I couldn’t find a transcript. (Would you really want his foreplay tips anyway?) The cover is more explicit about its conversation with Shirley MacLaine: “Why It Takes More Than One Lover to Satisfy Warren Beatty’s Big Sis!” The issue’s online seller uses a lot of capital letters to convince buyers that this particular Playgirl is worth your time, even if you don’t get a peek at Chevy’s chode. “HAIRY HUNKY EXECUTIVE MEN NUDE! OVER 10! MEN OF THE 80s CONTEST! 20 MEN!!! GREAT ISSUE!”

Then again, there might not be much of a market. As one Instagram commenter noted about the issue, “It’s all dicks, dieting and dudes I don’t want to see naked.”