12 Other Scary Shapes Besides the Bermuda Triangle
Being scared of all shapes would be a pretty crippling phobia. Good luck with sidewalks, or buying mid-century modern furniture! But even those of us who are perfectly comfortable with standard geometry have a couple of shapes that inspire fear. Perhaps the most famous of spooky shapes is the mysterious Bermuda Triangle, but given that most of us aren’t sailing anywhere, much less into parts unknown, it’s not much of a threat. There are other terrifying shapes, however, we’re much more likely to come into contact with. Such as…
Pentagrams
These things are absolute catnip for demons (and goths). Weird that circles are fine, and stars are all over cute spiral notebooks for kids, but put one in the other and it means hell.
Orbs/Spheres
Now, I’m not saying the sight of a fresh boba tea should send you running. When, however, an orb or sphere is hovering? Ominously? Buddy, you got a real problem. Not to mention when they’re showing up in your old family pictures. A cool bowling ball is the only glow-in-the-dark orb I’m interested in playing with, not the humming soul of a sick Victorian child.
Hourglasses
A stopwatch and an hourglass are two different ways to measure elapsed time, but weirdly, only one of them makes you immediately consider your mortality. I’ve never watched a guy timing the 40-yard dash and been sent into a deep depression. Sand pouring ominously from one chamber to another though? I’m calling my parents while I still can.
Hourglasses on Spiders
Keeping in mind the hourglass as a symbol of mortality, it’s actually an insanely sick choice of back piece by Black Widow spiders. Getting bit by a spider sucks already, because A) you’re itchy; and B) there’s a spider. Upgrade the chomper in question to a Black Widow, though? You’re about to do the most important Google search of your life.
That Cube From ‘Hellraiser’
Look, as a lifelong indoor kid and only child, puzzles are my shit. There’s nothing I like more than to while away the hours in a dimly lit room without blinking. Which is why it sucks so much how scary the Hellraiser puzzle is. You just wanted something to do with your hands, and now you’re getting dragged by your neck wattle into the Freak Dimension via a hooked chain.
Swastikas
Not generally a great thing to see. Yes, I know “it used to be a symbol of peace,” and Istanbul used to be Constantinople, but sometimes geopolitics change things and we all have to deal with it.
Too Many Circles
Trypophobia is a common, somewhat confusing fear of lots of neighboring holes that you’d think was discovered by Reddit based on how often it’s reposted there. I’m not posting a picture of it, because it’s one of those internet things that it’s fashionable to get unreasonably upset about, like using the word “moist.” Do you know how many rage-clicks we could get using it as a thumbnail? Don’t say we never did nothing for you.
Pyramid Heads
A video game villain that, despite representing trauma most kids would need 10 years and a Wiki article to fully understand, was still highly unsettling. The scariest monster the Pythagorean Theorem has ever applied to.
Two Lines on a Pregnancy Test
Now that’s scary!
That Optical Illusion of a Spinning Dancer
I know it’s just a trick of the eye and it can’t hurt me, but I despise this fucking thing. It makes me unsettled, and I feel like she’s going to be spinning in my bedroom corner, blacker than shadow, while I’m trying to sleep. Optical illusions in general should have to be behind some sort of flap, so that I can only look at them when I’m ready.
When Those Shapes Get Drawn on Winnie the Pooh’s Butt
Walt Disney Co.
I still don’t know exactly what’s going on here, but the first time I saw this as a kid it made me soak my little light-up sneakers with so much piss the LEDs died.
Ovals
At least when I open my bank account! Hey-o!
