Explaining Marvel's Illuminati Before We All Watch 'Doctor Strange 2’

Hey, so did you see the Illuminati in the new Doctor Strange movie?

Yes. I am on the internet. I have seen the trailer, like everyone else on the internet.

Right. Not caring for your tone much.

Sorry, I’m just trying to get my work done so I can go and see the movie!

Well, then I won’t keep you!

Thanks!

Just one thing …

Okay, Columbo.

Please could you quickly run us through the entire origin and history and also backstory of every character that makes up Marvel’s secret society … (with a booming voice) … THE ILLUMINATI!

Sigh. Okay, so the Illuminati —

Say it with the voice.

No. The Illuminati was formed by Tony Stark after the Kree-Skrull War because each member had information on the alien races that could’ve helped end the conflict, apparently. Forming the secret group was a hindsight move, and probably just an excuse to gather all the smartest, most powerful superheroes in one room so they could all congratulate each other on being super smart and also powerful. 

The members include Namor, King of the Atlantis, Professor X from the X-Men, Black Bolt who is King of the Inhumans, Fantastic Four leader Reed Richards, and of course Tony Stark and Doctor Strange. It seems the movie will have Karl Mordo, Captain Carter, and Captain Marvel as part of the Illuminati in, uh, this new universe, so we’ll have to see how that all works. Also Black Panther was initially included in the comics but ended up being the only one who didn’t want to meet or participate in the group’s activities afterward.

Probably wise. It all sounds like if the United Nations was a biannual dinner party at some big tech bro’s house.

Too true. Of course, Tony’s dead now. So we’ll have to wait and see what the movie does. Speaking of, I've got to run.

Just one last thing. Like … what did the Illuminati guys actually do?

Various things. They were the ones responsible for sending Hulk into outer space. They tried to basically think the Infinity Stones out of existence. Oh, and after the Kree-Skrull War they went to go and warn the Skrulls about messing with Earth, only to be captured and basically cause the Skrulls to infiltrate Earth years later during Secret Invasion.

Wow. So they’re exactly what you’d expect.

Also Namor eventually formed his own group of outright villains — fittingly called the Cabal — because nothing in these comics are subtle.

Death to subtlety!

And the Avengers ended up hunting down the remaining Illuminati members after they found out the secret society wiped Steve Rogers’ memory of some bad stuff they made him do.

Woof. Okay, that’s a lot to process.

As I’m sure this movie’s gonna be! Okay bye!

Zanandi is on Twitter and also on that other platform.

Top Image: Marvel/Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures