Actresses Are Constantly Forced To Do Weird Stuff
Subscribe to the Cracked Movie Club podcast on YouTube, Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts, and enter your email below to get the Cracked Movie Club newsletter where you can read these essays without ads and popups.
Get the best of Cracked sent directly to your inbox!
Sign up for the Cracked Newsletter
Monday, on Cracked Movie Club, we'll discuss From Justin To Kelly which you can rent on Prime. The episode releases Monday at 3PM EST.
Don't Miss
Until then. A thought.
Watching From Justin To Kelly — starring Kelly Clarkson and Justing Guarini, American Idol season 1 winner and runner-up, respectively — is one of the worst viewing experiences I’ve ever had. It’s not so bad it’s good. It’s so bad I almost bought tickets to a Kelly Clarkson concert just so I could yell “YOU KNOW WHAT’S BEHIND THOSE HAZEL EYES? EXTREMELY POOR TASTE IN FILMS!”
But as it turns out, that’d be unfair to Ms. Clarkson, because apparently she always thought the movie would suck. She just couldn’t NOT do the movie because she was contractually obligated to star in it as punishment for her American Idol win. It's a real-life Faustian deal. Simon Cowell is actually the Devil.
And that’s fine, I would certainly trade a starring role in From Jordan To The $5 DVD At Wal-Mart for, like, an Oscar or a billion dollars or whatever, but it's not any more palatable watching Clarkson kiss ol’ Justin with a healthy dose of tongue knowing she was contractually obligated to mix spit. So I decided to look up a few other times Cracked has written about actresses forced into things in the name of acting (out the fantasies of creepy male directors).
Sadie Sink was entirely unaware her character would kiss Caleb McLaughlin’s character during the second season finale of Stranger Things Season 2 until the day of shooting. It wasn’t in the script, the then-15-year old didn’t want to do it, but ultimately one of the show’s creators Ross Duffer (an adult man) thought it’d be funny if she had to do a kiss specifically because she was so freaked out by the possibility of being forced to do so. Cool.
Sharon Stone Was Tricked Into Flashing Millions Of People
The only reason anybody remembers the movie Basic Instinct is because of Sharon Stone's fully commando leg uncrossing scene. The thing is, she wasn’t aware the scene would be explicitly shown rather than merely implied. The director, Paul Verhoeven, told Stone the white of her underwear was showing on camera—which already is a liiiiiittle weird—so he convinced her to remove her underwear (which he shoved in his pocket) and then proceeded to film the scene with everything on display. Stone wasn’t aware she'd been literally exposed until she saw the film. In theaters.
Tippie Hedren Was Actually Attacked By (The) Birds
Ever wondered why the bird attack scenes in The Birds look so real? It’s because they are. But it’s cool, because director Alfred Hitchcock was only trying to make the movie look authentic. Well, that aaaaaaaaaand the lead actress kept rebuffing his sexual advances. So.
Convicted Sex Offender Roman Polanski Forced A Vegetarian To Eat Raw Chicken
Pretty straightforward, but Roman Polanski forced Mia Farrow to eat raw chicken liver on the set of Rosemary’s Baby for several takes despite the fact that she was a vegetarian. And also despite her being a human being who shouldn’t be forced to eat raw chicken liver.
Margot Kidder Is ADORABLE When Blind
While filming Superman, Lois Lane's eye (played by Margot Kidder) was accidentally scratched while in makeup, and she was no longer able to put in contacts. The show went on, however, despite the fact that Kidder was now virtually blind and constantly bumping into shit.
But the director Richard Donner LOVED that Kidder kept bumping into shit, so even after her eye healed, he banned her from wearing contacts. So she’d continue bumping into shit, you see.
Notice something in From Justin To Kelly we missed? Shoot us your thoughts at movieclub@cracked.com for a chance to be featured in next week’s newsletter!
This essay comes from the new Cracked Movie Club newsletter. Want more like this, straight to your email inbox, without any ads or popups? Join here:
Sign up for the Cracked Newsletter
Get the best of Cracked sent directly to your inbox!
