Disney Really Dropped the Ball on Baby Yoda Merch
In case you hadn't noticed, "Baby Yoda" has taken over the internet. Yes, this vast global network full of smut, video games, and smutty video games is singularly obsessed with the tiny green alien from the new Star Wars series The Mandalorian. Is he Yoda's son? His clone? Who gives a poodoo, he's cute as hell. Everyone quit paying attention to the sprawling horrors of the real world and look at him holding his widdle cup.
Okay, we see what's happening here. Just like with the Ewoks and BB-8, we're getting another nauseatingly adorable Star Wars character that was created purely for the purpose of selling toys. Except ... there aren't any? What?
As further proof that we're all living in some kind of backward mirror universe, people are actually complaining about a lack of Star Wars toys. Soon after fans fell in love with the character, bootleg Baby Yoda merchandise began popping up all over the web, because there simply weren't any official products available. Some items were pretty cool. Others, a $600 dollar nightmare.
Eventually, Disney did release some Baby Yoda merch, but what we got was shockingly lazy. All they made were some t-shirts, mugs, and tote bags with the exact same still image of the character. Isn't coming up with useless crap featuring iconic characters supposed to be Disney's whole deal? They couldn't at least find a second photo to use?
Now finally they have revealed an actual Baby Yoda toy-- though sadly, not an accompanying plush Werner Herzog. Insanely though, this thing is only available for pre-order and won't actually ship until June 2020. That's more than six months away, which admittedly is less time in Yoda years.
We get that Disney likely wanted to preserve the twist of Baby Yoda's existence, but this thing could have been the toy of the Christmas season! Remember when the world went nuts for a robot Muppet with a tickle fetish? This Baby Yoda toy would have been an even bigger phenomenon. Like Arnold Schwarzenegger battling Sinbad levels of holiday insanity. Although, perhaps the "whole toy not being ready in time for Christmas due to a gross underestimation of public demand" is yet another retro throwback to the original movie, seeing as a lot of Star Wars fans woke up Christmas morning in 1977 to find an empty box beneath the tree.
You (yes, you) should follow JM on Twitter!
For more, check out A Glove Is The Narrator Of A New Michael Jackson Musical and At Least Your Thanksgiving Wasn't As Bad As Kid Rock's.
Follow us on Facebook, you should.
