Top Picks 09.29.09: 8-Bit Hotties and Moms' Crushes
Some of the best stuff from around the web and the Cracked.com Mirth Canal.
09.29.2009
Top Eight 8-Bit Hotties:DOB was upset he didn't make this list of men your mom's have crushes on:
7 Most Amazing One Take Video Clips:
The 100 Greatest Youtube Clips in 4 Minutes:
The Eiffel Tower is so much more than a monument in Paris:
Family Guy goes Disney:
Be your own Daniel-san in Amateur Ninja:
Buy Cracked Editor David Wong's book right now:
"What's that scent you're wearing? It's... interes-" "It's jizz.":
Thanks to Susannah via email.
"Alright, got that roof off the house. Let's go grab a beer." "Frank, are you sure we got the right house?":
Insane surfing wipeouts:
"Hi, I'm looking for Mr... Uh... Horse Dick?":
Is this really what dating was like in 1987?:
Thanks to Man with Beard in the Mirth Canal.
Top 10 Jay-Z Disses:
7 Ways the Internet is Ruining Your Life:
The National Science Foundation Love to Surf Porn and Cost Tax Payers Money:
5 X-Men Spin-offs they Need to Make:
50 Extraordinary and Attractive Billboards:
Double the Fun: 100 Sexy Photos of Twins:
10 Hints that Stewie is Gay:
South Park invades real-life, again:
Thanks to Mongo in the Mirth Canal.
Your favorite video game characters on Facebook:
Lisa Marie sure has a lot of faith in her pigtails:
11 Things Google Should Atone for on Its 11th Anniversary:
20 Disturbing Family Photos:
Conan gives it his all... and injures himself:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: probably the most specific page in the entire database.
Submitted by KellstErik in the Mirth Canal.
If you want to find out what we're looking at online before we post it here, be sure to follow us on Twitter
09.25.2009
20 Pictures of Animals Being Gay:Song: "The Wrong Hole":
25 Pictures of People Who Dressed Themselves in the Dark:
Best Robot Chicken moments featuring giant robots:
Human Tetris:
There might actually be a computer movie cooler than Wargames:
Thanks to MC via email.
Top 10 Action Babes:
"Was I just in a wreck? Awesome. Time to masturbate":
True Life: I Answered a Craigslist Ad:
Baffling. Just... baffling:
Who needs sexy clothes when you have sexy paint?:
Who thought the dance squad would be hotter than the cheerleaders?:
Honda introduces the Segway's retarded cousin:
Thanks to Vlad the Impala in the Mirth Canal.
Believe it or not, Ian Fortey does work outside of Cracked: Inside the Mind of a Cow Sex Trial Jurist:
4 People Who Make Dexter Look Like a Model Citizen:
Wallace and Gromit's Latest Adventure:
Which Movie Hero Are You?:
Vanessa Raia knows how to wear a tie properly:
Finally, a site for sports fans and chronic masturbators:
Thanks to Remora in the Mirth Canal.
11 Most Ironically Banned Books of All Time:
Insane basketball shot:
From top-tier NFL quarterback to "that guy" in the back of the photo:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A list of films that you'll never ever get to see.
Submitted by polancoj16 in the Mirth Canal.
09.23.2009
The 13 Funniest SNL Digital Shorts:
Awkward family moments:
A new PSA from Will Ferrell:
"Did you bring protection?" "Yes, I always keep kebabs on me. You know, just to be safe.":
"After you destroy this crucifix, we shall feast on the Smarties inside... and then have cake and ice cream.":
The Venture Bros. panel from Dragon*Con:
The 10 Worst Movies to Open at Number One:
10 Non-Pornographic Pictures Bob Saget Has Definitely Masturbated To:
Is your hair turning women off? Probably:
"Freeze! You're under arre- Hey, is that a Wii?":
Charlize Theron gets naked in public:
The greatest Half Life 2 mod. Ever:
Thanks to TinyPenguininja in the Mirth Canal.
Who'd win the fight between Superman and the Hulk?:
One Queen and Eleven Presidents:
What a lovely... everything you have, Jennifer Copeland:
A very disturbing set of videos:
Thanks to The Moose in the Mirth Canal.
10 of the Funniest South Park Songs:
11 Photos Ruined By Animals Doing Nasty Things:
Girl or sex doll?:
Thanks to Wendy via email.
11 Types of Strangers:
15 Reasons Why Longcat is Inducted into the Geek Hall of Fame:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Women in refrigerators. Sadly, it wasn't what our sexually depraved minds were hoping for.
Submitted by Demos182 in the Mirth Canal.
09.18.2009
Top 10 It's Always Sunny Moments:
Blondes maybe easy targets, but this one killed an alligator. What the hell have you done today?:
The most compelling argument in favor of gay marriage:
Viva Caligula: "You know, just on my way to an orgy, murdering people and junk. Just another day.":
Who are the most influential men of 2009? Ask Men has the answer:
People laugh at our anti-nature campaign. But this monkey pushed a woman off a cliff. Fuck that:
10 Unbelievable Videos of Little Kids Getting Owned (It's not what you think, NAMBLA):
Sherri Gulley's school uniform doesn't fit quite right:
This is why you don't fuck with gamers. Ever:
Thanks to revdevsadvct in the Mirth Canal.
What romantic comedies think about men:
The cruelest photo on the planet:
6 People Who Could Play Bilbo Baggins:
Amazon Hijacked: 10 Funniest Review Threads:
Thanks to Mike via email.
10 Dumbest People Who Deliver Our News:
"My goatee isn't stupid.":
We finally found some Ghostbusters hotter than Bill Murray:
Gladstone claims it's a snake with a leg. Seanbaby maintains that it just has a mutated dick. Brockway wants to get it drunk:
Thanks to RuneJoker in the Mirth Canal.
10 Craziest Baseball Rules from the Past:
Jay Leno mocks children for not reading, messes up plot to Hamlet:
We thought we were going to be seeing actual whale tails. Still, we weren't disappointed:
11 Real Names of Rappers:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: This tree ain't nobody's property.
Submitted by DNASnatcher in the Mirth Canal.
09.15.2009
A site for zombie lovers everywhere:
Five secretly awesome things you didn't know Patrick Swayze accomplished in his life:
A sneak peek at Titan Maximum, the story of five idiots trying to save a moon of Saturn:
Awesome and up close pictures of tornadoes:
10 Most Ridiculous Romance Novel Titles:
15 Awesome Old School Photos of Ah-nold:
"Th- That's not a bear." "Just roll with it.":
5 Ways Wolverine Could've Been Sharper:
Yes, DOB, Kanye West is retarded:
Thanks to BondFiction in the Mirth Canal.
One man Michael Jackson cover, a capella:
Where retarded tweets go to die:
Thanks to Tyrone via email.
Swaim kept saying he had evidence that being an elk would rule. We never thought he'd be right:
18 Photos of the weirdest competition on Earth:
11 Hidden Secrets in Fight Club:
21 Failed Twitter Hashtags:
10 Best Athletes Who Are Bad:
Don't barf, don't barf, don't ba- Holy shit!:
Marshmallow Torture:
Thanks to Ripper in the Mirth Canal.
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Need a good book about bagpipes? Look no further, friends.
Submitted by nchammer326 in the Mirth Canal.
09.11.2009
11 Best Tranny Moments in Entertainment:
11 Greatest Superhero Bromances:
A review of the sexercise ball! By an actual woman! (NSFW):
Adult Swim serves Hitler a fresh dish of hatin':
10 Incredibly Nasty NASCAR Crashes:
Megan Fox says she won't appear in any nude scenes or sex tapes. We can all stop caring about her now:
6 Truly True Blood Moments from Season 2:
Of all the things South Africa doesn't get right, we figured broadband Internet wouldn't be on that list:
Thanks to ralf23 in the Mirth Canal.
How Joe Wilson interacts with young interns:
If this doesn't tug at your heartstrings it's probably because you don't have a heart:
Apparently someone in D.C. forgot to check their calendar today:
We've never heard of Humping Guy before, but we like his style:
Thanks to Maria via email.
10 People Who Made it Cool to be Drunk:
Is Nick McDonell the next Hunter S. Thompson?:
The greatest keytar player ever:
10 Jolliest Chick Bullriders:
You know what? We'll pass on that birthday invite:
Can Dokken defeat this chicken breast?:
Thanks to Disco Stu in the Mirth Canal.
Great, just what the world needs: another Internet meme:
7 Shattered Objects That Shouldn't Be:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: In case you ever need to look up a catgirl, now you know where to go.
Submitted by TheAlmightyCoxy in the Mirth Canal.
09.08.2009
Pole dancing dolls and cussing cats:
Australians have huge toilets, apparently:
We'd let her kick our ass any day of the week:
Fantasy Telemarketer is cold-calling your name:
Will Draw Anything for $2:
Thanks to Vermillion in the Mirth Canal.
Marvel's New Fall Line-Up:
20 Awesome Divorce Cakes:
"Those elk won't get out of the street." "K, we'll talk to them... hey guys, you mind moving?" "Fuck you, copper!":
Where to go if you need the scoop on the bathroom you're about to use. Is there an app for this?:
A Tribute to Hot Girls Draped on Cars:
The Former Careers of UFC Fighters:
5 Characters that Embody the Spirit of Labor Day:
Just a few reasons we avoid Wal-Mart:
Thanks to Jes via email.
"I bet you can't do a life-sized Harley." "Done." "Son of a-":
Looks like someone needs LifeCall:
15 Awful Obama Tattoos:
We're still debating if this is better than Toto's version:
Thanks to VoodooTissue in the Mirth Canal.
That Jennifer Vaughn is one piece of ass. We know from experience, dude. If you know what we mean:
We're thinking anyone who has a set will avoid this place:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Did Hungary compete in the '88 Winter Olympics?
Submitted by Quagmar in the Mirth Canal.
09.04.2009
Megan Fox lesbian kiss and Captain EO returns:
A few reasons why you should be watching the U.S. Open:
The best Adult Swim on-air promos:
Cute picture? Or undeniable proof of pedophile pandas:
11 Worst Movie Posters From the 80s:
10 Awesome Holes-in-One:
Item #332 that rednecks can blame on Obama: a shortage in demolition derby cars:
A new way for women to make money in this hard economic climate:
Beavis and Butthead return to review Extract:
Can't keep track of all the awesome stuff you don't want to miss this Fall? Don't worry, Ask Men has your back:
Ben and Jerry's gay marriage themed ice cream contains chocolate covered pretzels. We did not make that up:
Thanks to FlyingSquid in the Mirth Canal.
Some pics to get you in the mood for Halloween:
Colleen Carrera shows us how to wear an eyepatch:
We're still trying to decide which one is hotter:
10 Bizarre Cigarette Ads:
An interesting way to support healthcare reform:
Thanks to reckless abrandon in the Mirth Canal.
A look back on this summer's movies:
A new, deadly way to put on a rubber:
The 10 Hottest Hip-Hop Wives:
Thanks to Alex via email.
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: When Kobe Bryant said he learned his crossover from God, he wasn't kidding.
Submitted by Optimus Pimp in the Mirth Canal.
09.01.2009
The 10 Best Family Guy Back-2-School Clips:
Tetris can alter the structure of your brain... but only after it gets the long, straight piece:
This fat kid loves bacon. Go figure:
How Intimate is Too Intimate?:
Some horror sequels that weren't all that terrible:
10 Catastrophic Ways Men Have Tried to Look Pretty:
Disney buys Marvel and plans for Rambo 5:
Samurai on the Toilet:
Thanks to PJ via email.
Glenn Beck reinforces our belief that Mormons are dirty, filthy perverts:
Thanks to skatfree in the Mirth Canal.
The most ridiculous fight scene ever:
The battle of the Jens versus the Angies:
Reason #124 why we won't have children:
We're not sure if Mindi Smith really knows how to wash a car. We also don't care:
10 Songs That Will Prepare You for a Robot Uprising:
The most terrifying banana ever:
Thanks to plustax in the Mirth Canal.
24 photos of people on roller coasters:
The 13 Sexiest Superhero Costumes:
11 Terrible Translations for Nintendo:
A Cracked intern:
101 Ridiculously Hot Redheads:
And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A list of people who married their cousins.
Submitted by Dan the Great in the Mirth Canal.
