12 Sports Mascots That Inspire Fear, Not Fans

A cowboy! That’s fun! But why did you sculpt his face to look like he’s watching his son bleed out on the dusty ground?

Not someone you’d really allow near your children even before the whole Spotlight situation.

A smooth, long-nosed fish that stands on two legs is just never going to work. You can cram as many tiny helmets on him as you want.

“Come, child. Rest your weary legs, and slip out of this world and into the next.” Not to mention, Mr. Redlegs sounds straight up like something you unleash upon your family by dabbling in the occult.

When your school’s mascot is a dog, that should be the easiest slam dunk of all time. Instead we end up with something that haunts the Scottish moors and craves children’s bone marrow.

The first iteration of Pierre the Pelican lasted only a year before a new, less terrifying Pierre was introduced. The old one, I assume was shot, and his body stirred deep into the mud of the bayou.

It’s cool when a mascot nods to a bit of local folklore, like the plastic baby hidden in king cakes during Mardi Gras. I just think it could look a little less like a trauma dream embodying the unresolved grief of a miscarriage.

Sure, his eyes are terrifying, but at least they’re set in putty-colored, pallid plastic skin that looks like it was harvested off a corpse.

Which came first — the name or the face?

The Wichita State logo, featuring this same bundle of wheat, is actually awesome. Taking it into the third dimension, sadly, resulted in a horrific sports creature that needs to be threshed posthaste so we can all heal.

On one hand, the handmade nature of it is kind of charming. On the other, those lips.

This isn’t an official, team-sanctioned mascot. Instead, it’s a fan who insisted on dressing up like this, and kept doing it until everyone just sort of let him. Your call on whether that’s better or worse.