14 Big Swings in the History of Ransoms and Kidnappings
Sadly, the Bananas in Pyjamas have been rotting in a Russian gulag for decades.
Don’t Bet on Compassion From an Oil Baron
J. Paul Getty III was the grandson of a billionaire oil tycoon, and as such, used to goof around about faking his own kidnapping to get some extra cash. When he was eventually kidnapped for real, Getty the Elder was in no hurry to get his grandson back, saying, “If I pay one penny now, I’ll have 14 kidnapped grandchildren.” He stalled for so long that the kidnappers cut off the kid’s ear. He finally agreed to pay — but only the highest amount that was still tax deductible. He loaned the rest of the ransom to his son, and forced him to pay him back with interest.
The Emperor of the Incas
Emperor Atahualpa had just won a huge civil war when he was caught off guard by 160 Spaniards with guns in 1532. He offered to fill up a large room with riches — once with gold and twice with silver — in exchange for his life. After he’d had about $250 million worth of treasure from all over his empire shipped in and melted down, the Spanish decided to kill him anyway.
The Future Emperor of Rome
Twenty-five-year-old Julius Caesar was kidnapped by pirates. He claimed the pirates demanded 20 talents of gold (a few million dollars worth), but Caesar said he was worth at least 50. Either way, it was a pretty bad deal, because he later tracked them down and sold them into slavery.
Charlie Chaplin’s Dead Body
A few months after he died in 1977, a pair of grave robbers dug up Chaplin’s corpse and demanded $400,000 from his widow. Oona Chaplin strung them along, refusing to play ball even when they launched hollow threats at her children. Meanwhile, police were keeping an eye on local pay phones, which is exactly where they caught the robbers. Chaplin’s now buried safely under a bunch of concrete.
You Should’ve Offered More for Frank Sinatra’s Son
Nineteen-year-old Frank Sinatra, Jr. was kidnapped from the dressing room of a club where he was going to perform in Lake Tahoe. The kidnappers demanded $240,000, but Sinatra Senior insisted his baby boy was worth $1 million. Money was exchanged, the kid was returned and all three kidnappers were arrested — but oddly, only two-thirds of the money was ever recovered.
Ransomware for a Good Cause
In 2013, a 21-year-old knocked on the FBI’s door and said, in so many words, “ya got me!”, after getting one of those ransomware messages claiming that the feds were onto him. He was kind enough to bring his computer with him, chock-full of illegal pornography and messages to an underage girl.
Kidnapping an Anti-Kidnapping Expert
U.S. Army Major Felix Batista was a consultant for a security firm, where he negotiated almost 100 kidnapping and ransom resolutions. He was kidnapped in 2008, apparently in exchange for a kidnapped friend of his, and hasn’t been heard from since.
A Ransom Note Sold for $20,000
America’s first high-profile kidnapping victim, four-year-old Charley Ross, was abducted in 1874. It made national news, but the child was never found. In 2012, original copies of the ransom note were discovered, reading “You wil have to pay us before you git him from us, and pay us a big cent to if you put the cops hunting for him you is only defeeting yu own end.” The notes themselves were sold for what the thieves had reportedly asked for all those decades ago: $20,000.
A Guy Staged His Own Kidnapping to Escape His Wife
A Texas man was ripped away from his darling wife by two armed, masked men, but came back two days later, saying the nice fellas had agreed to release him. In the meantime, his wife had — duh — called the police, who searched for the man on foot and by helicopter. When the guy got back unharmed, the cops wanted more details, and found he had staged the whole thing so he could go party with his friends.
A Guy Staged His Own Kidnapping Because He Was Late to Work
A Brazilian soccer player known as Somália told his coach he missed practice because he was kidnapped at gunpoint. But a police investigation found that in reality, he was just running late for work, which would have been punishable by a 40 percent cut in his daily pay.
Algiers Extorted One-Twentieth of the United States’ National Budget
After the Revolutionary War, the U.S. found itself having to fend off Barbary pirates on its own. Instead of cutting a deal to prevent kidnapping, they just paid off the pirates every time they ‘napped. That wound up costing them $1 million in 1795 alone.
A Gangster Bit Off More Than He Could Chew
After successfully kidnapping the son of a businessman for $134 million — the second-highest kidnapping payout of all time — Hong Kong gangster Cheung Tze-keung went after the son of a property developer (blindfolding him for four days and giving him permanent psychological damage) and then a casino magnate he’d lost a ton of money to. These last two got him caught, and he was executed in 1998.
The Biggest Kidnapping Payout in History
Two brothers who’d made a fortune in the Argentinian grain trade, Jorge and Juan Born, were held captive for nine months before finally paying out $60 million in 1974. That’s about $293 million today.
The Bananas in Pyjamas Are Languishing in a Russian Prison to This Day
Australian actor Kenneth Radley, who brought the iconic B1 to life for a decade, said that the network’s marketing dorks took the costumes on a worldwide promotional tour, and while in Moscow, they were stolen by the Russian mob. Instead of paying the $100,000 ransom, they just made two new suits for $20,000 each. The bananas remain “in some gulag in Russia, in some freezing cold jail.”