‘Deadpool & Wolverine’ Had to Cut NSFW Mickey Mouse Joke
Back in August — admittedly, a simpler, more innocent time — Deadpool & Wolverine director Shawn Levy teased a punchline so foul that it absolutely needed to be dropped from the film’s final cut.
“We have made a pact, Ryan and I, to go to our grave with that line, but I will say that it was replaced with an equally dirty line of dialogue about Pinocchio shoving his face up Deadpool’s ass and starting to lie like crazy,” Levy said. “I was like, ‘Ryan, that’s your replacement line in response to, ‘Can we clean it up?’ That’s Ryan Reynolds for you, audacious to the very edge.”
The calendar just turned to December and so much for going to the grave. The secret’s already out, with no dead bodies to show for it. Dirty secrets being revealed is not so surprising. But here’s a jaw-dropper for you: The Dirtiest Joke of ‘Em All is posted in the screenplay on Disney’s ‘For Your Consideration’ website.
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What’s the joke that had to be changed? The not-so-clean version that made it into the movie went something like this:
DEADPOOL: Fuck! What, we can’t even afford one more X-Man? Disney is so cheap. I got Pinocchio jammed in my ass, and he’s lying like crazy.
In the original version, the script landed on a different punchline:
DEADPOOL: Fuck! What, we can’t even afford one more X-Man? Disney is so cheap. I can barely breathe with all this Mickey Mouse cock in my throat.
And that whirring sound you hear is Walt Disney spinning in his grave.
In September, according to Deadline, Reynolds also teased the cut at the Fast Company Innovation Festival in New York. “There was only one line in the entire film that they asked me to take out.” He refused to give in to an audience who longed to hear the nastiness. “No. No. No! And they were right!”
Reynolds recounted the phone call he received about the original script. “Ryan, Bob Iger here. Would love it if you’d take that one line out. It’s really going to make our life hard over here.”
Reynolds admitted that Disney saying “You can’t” triggered something in his comedy brain that said, “Must keep line! Precious!” But after that initial rush of defiance, the Deadpool actor simply penned alternate obscenities. “As soon as the fog of war lifts and you have a second thought, it’s like, ‘Of course I can take that out. Can I say something about Pinocchio instead?’ And the answer is yes!”
Somehow, Deadpool & Wolverine still managed to become the highest-grossing R-rated movie of all time without referencing Mickey’s animated extremities. Bring on the Oscar nominations.