The Joke That Made David Letterman Bail on a Joan Rivers Interview

Comedian, fashion critic and awkward party guest Joan Rivers was famously banned from The Tonight Show because she had the temerity to… take a job? Johnny Carson was absolutely furious that Rivers accepted an offer to host a competing talk show, and Jay Leno continued to enforce the ban because, well, Jay Leno sucks, I guess. 

But Leno’s competition, The Late Show with David Letterman, was totally free to host Rivers. And one memorable Rivers segment ended with Letterman removing his jacket and storming off the set. But it was all in good fun.

Back in 2014, Rivers made headlines for a tense interview with CNN’s Fredricka Whitfield. After the host pressed Rivers on issues ranging from the boundaries of humor to the ethics of fur, Rivers complained about the “negative” tone of the interview. “You are not the one to interview a person who does humor, sorry,” Rivers proclaimed while removing her microphone and promptly storming off of the set. 

Incidentally, this was all to promote Rivers’ book, which was literally called Diary of a Mad Diva.

A lot of viewers seemed to suspect that Rivers’ unusually dramatic exit was staged for publicity purposes. But Rivers told reporters at the time, “I do not do, and never have done, PR 'stunts.'” 

Not long after the CNN debacle, Rivers stopped by The Late Show, and, naturally, the subject of her abbreviated interview came up. Rivers complained that the host was “opinionated,” “nasty” and “negative,” jokingly adding, “It was like my wedding night.”

When Letterman questioned her about the possibility that the whole thing was a “publicity stunt to promote the book” Rivers again denied it, and claimed that she’s “so easy to work with.” At that point she launched into a story about how she was up for an Activia commercial, which she really needed to get because she’d lost out on a Depends commercial to actress June Allyson.

“Remember June Allyson? ‘Hi, I’m June Allyson. While I’m talking to you, I’m taking a dump.’ I mean, it was one of the great commercials,” Rivers observed.

At this point in the show, Letterman rose from his chair, removed his jacket, and took Rivers’ lead by storming off of the set. 

Rivers, left to her own devices, then decided to exercise her talk show host muscles by interviewing herself in Letterman’s absence, asking questions such as “So, where are you from?” and “How’s your sex life you old bitch?” Rivers then started making dry vagina jokes that we’re guessing weren’t written out on Letterman’s cue cards. 

Letterman eventually returned to his desk, and Rivers offered one final point in her defense: “Comedians make you laugh just like the Olive Garden gives you diarrhea.”

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