‘King of the Hill’ Fans Might Have Solved An Age-Old Linguistic Mystery About ‘Beowulf’

That Grendel ain’t right.

Out of anyone in the central family of King of the Hill, Hank would probably be the last Hill you’d expect to make a significant contribution to the field of linguistics. Peggy, with her ground-breaking, experimental approach to Spanish pronunciation, would probably be the first pick, followed by Bobby, whose mastery of wordplay and proclivity for puns produce many novel and comical expressions of the English language. Luanne, with her peculiar interpretation of words such as “ignorant,” “Communism” and “Luanne,” would be more than happy to provide an alternate, less informed viewpoint to any linguistics debate. Hank, however, is a man of few words who wields them bluntly and without any frills — much like how Beowulf swung Hrunting back in his day. 

Earlier this week, language enthusiasts on Twitter discussed the true meaning behind the first word of the epic poem Beowulf, one of the most important pieces of Old-English literature to the linguistics community. The first word of Beowulf contains a the thousand-year-old mystery that the most brilliant academic minds have yet to solve conclusively, as the definition of “Hwæt!” continues to elude scholars to this day.

Perhaps Beowulf saw some Saxon grilling a sheep with coal instead of using a clean-burning fuel. 

Legendary fantasy writer and philologist J.R.R. Tolkien once opined that “Hwæt!” is, most likely, “a note ‘striking up’ at the beginning of a poem.” However, the Lord of the Rings writer would be wise to take his European, soccer-loving ass to the Renaissance Faire unless he wants a swift kick in it. Clearly, “Hwæt” is an expression of alarm and exasperation, as demonstrated by Hank’s perpetual use of the phrase, which is a fitting opening for a poem that begins with a giant, murderous monster terrorizing a bunch of Vikings (not the Minnesota kind).

Much like Beowulf, Hank himself isn’t one who would concern himself with poems when there are asses that need kicking, so it’s unlikely that he would ever insert himself into a linguistics debate that’s been raging on for a thousand years. However, unlike Beowulf, Hank’s story isn’t over yet — Mike Judge’s revival of King of the Hill is scheduled to premiere early next year.