Nicolas Cage’s Creepiest Character Is Still ‘Nic Cage on SNL’

The big new horror movie coming out this weekend is Longlegs, starring Maika Monroe as an FBI agent and Nicolas Cage as the titular serial killer, who we assume has an impressive set of gams. 

Cage’s character is apparently so creepy that no images of him have been included in the trailer or any of the film’s marketing. So instead, here’s a clip of him getting so horny that his brain explodes in a Japanese electronics commercial:

But Longlegs is far from the first time that Cage has played a big creep. In fact, you could argue that one of his creepiest roles was that of Nicolas Cage, host of Saturday Night Live.

Cage has only hosted the show once, for the Season 18 premiere back in 1992. He did have previous TV comedy experience, having starred alongside Crispin Glover in the pilot for a teen series called The Best of Times. In retrospect, it’s too bad that he never showed off these dance moves in any of the National Treasure movies. 

Cage’s SNL monologue found the star launching into a speech about his obsession with his Honeymoon in Vegas co-star Sarah Jessica Parker’s “beautiful, big breasts.” Then he talks about Moonstruck, specifically Cher’s “incredibly beautiful ass,” all while the audience grows increasingly uncomfortable. 

Before Cage is able to objectify Kathleen Turner, he’s called backstage to talk to Lorne Michaels who chastises Cage for his sexist comments. Cage ends up apologizing, but only after Michaels makes a lewd remark about Cage’s 21-year-old cousin Sofia Coppola — presumably because male writers in 1992 thought that the best way to solve misogyny was with more misogyny.

All in all, it was a gross sketch that may or may not explain why Cage has never hosted the show since.

Incidentally, Cage’s monologue led to a tense situation for SNL writer/thief Al Franken. During Cage’s tête-à-tête with Michaels, he laments that the audience probably thinks that he’s the “biggest jerk who’s ever been on the show.” But Michaels reassures him, “No, no, that would be Steven Seagal.” 

Not long after the Cage episode aired, Franken was booked on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, and the other guest that night was none other than Seagal. According to Franken, Seagal asked, in all seriousness, “Why did Lorne say that about me? That I was the worst host ever?” 

Franken froze, while Leno tried to pacify Seagal, telling him that it was just “because you’re such a big star!”

After proving that he was willing to portray himself as a lecherous Hollywood pervert, Cage did briefly return to Studio 8H, not to host, but to appear alongside Andy Samberg’s “Nicolas Cage” during Weekend Update. Once again, he was willing to poke fun at himself, suggesting that he and Samberg have a “three-way with the Declaration of Independence.” 

Which would be more disturbing to watch than anything in Longlegs.

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