Scarlett Johansson Is ‘Terrified’ of Colin Jost and Michael Che’s ‘Weekend Update’ Joke Swap

It’s one thing when Colin Jost and Michael Che roast each other during Weekend Update with the (now more than) annual joke swap. It’s another if you’re married to Jost, knowing you’ll likely get caught in the comic crossfire. Here, for example, is the slap Scarlett Johansson took on this year’s Saturday Night Live season finale, courtesy of her husband (via Che): “ChatGPT has released a new voice assistant feature inspired by Scarlett Johansson’s A.I. character in Her, which I’ve never bothered to watch, because without that body, what’s the point of listening?”

That was a tame one, Johansson told Kelly Clarkson this week. “We need to go into witness protection after that night,” she explained. “I am absolutely terrified we’re going to be targeted.” That’s a good bet — Che and Jost’s tradition of trying to embarrass one another often includes Johansson. Here are a couple more burns at her expense from previous swaps:

• “It was announced that Creed singer Scott Stapp will play Frank Sinatra in an upcoming movie, but the good news is Sammy Davis Jr. will be played by Scarlett Johansson.”
• “New York State now allows movie theaters to serve alcohol, which is how I’m finally able to enjoy my wife’s little art movies. I’m kidding, honey. I love all of your movies, and if you ask me, you’re an even better black widow than Coretta Scott King.”

“It’s so bad,” Johansson reiterated to Clarkson. “I blacked out for that period of the night. I actually don’t remember it. As soon as the picture came up, I was like …” (insert the actress screaming for effect).

Clarkson, however, is a fan. “I love that it’s live,” she said, “and he just has to say it.”

“It is brutal,” Johansson replied. “I feel like every year it gets worse. It’s just terrible.”

A less famous spouse wouldn’t be a target for punchlines, but then again, a less famous spouse wouldn’t have Johansson’s very public tools for exacting revenge on Jost, even if he’s not the one writing the mean jokes. Turns out that the SNL star was obligated to cameo in her new movie, Fly Me To The Moon, whether he liked it or not.

“Colin, I think he had to do it because it’s in our prenuptial agreement,” Johansson joked to Jimmy Fallon on The Tonight Show. “If I ask him to do something, he has to be there to support me. He has to be in every one of my films.”

Considering Fly Me to the Moon’s so-so reviews, maybe Jost would have preferred to have been roasted instead.