Seinfeld: 12 Fan Theories For Your Consideration

Did Elaine break J. Peterman's heart?
Seinfeld: 12 Fan Theories For Your Consideration

Seinfeld fans love nothing more than watching a show so many times, that they need to add their own spin to the storylines. Put on your thinking caps and suspend your disbelief because we have 12 hot new Seinfeld fan theories. 

Crazy Joe Davola Was "The Lopper"

Joe Davola

NBC

This theory seems to have some pretty solid footing behind it. The last appearance of Joe Davola is in the episode, “The Pilot,” wherein Davola tries to kill Jerry at the taping of his new show. We don’t know what happens after this, but the theory postulates that Davola went to prison, where his hatred for Jerry stewed. When released. he started beheading anyone who looked like Jerry, becoming “The Lopper.” Kramer informs Jerry that all the victims look like him, which makes this theory a lot more plausible. 

Peterman's Breakdown Was Elaine's Fault

Elaine and peterman

NBC

Reddit user R/TheLuckyGal theorizes that Elaine and Peterman had an affair between seasons 6 and 7, resulting in his eventual nervous breakdown and fleeing to Burma. Elaine has a pretty bad track record of pushing her lovers to their emotional limits. For example, “Russell Dalrymple (NBC executive who leaves his job & dies at sea to impress Elaine), Lloyd Braun (Mayor's campaign manager who suffers a nervous breakdown), Crazy Joe Davola, David Puddy (germaphobe), and Ricky (tv guide fanatic who makes mannequins like her).” Elaine is also attracted to wealthy men, which is obvious when she finds out how much money Jerry makes. Peterman also puts her in charge of the entire company while he is away, despite there being far more qualified employees. 

Elaine's Father Played A Role In The Assassination Of JFK

Elaine's Dad Seinfeld

NBC

In a throwaway line, Elaine mentions to someone at a party that her father used to work at the book depository during Kennedy’s assassination. She also mentions that Lee Harvey Oswald worked there at the same time as her father and that he gave her father a flimsy alibi during the time Kennedy was shot. If Elaine’s dad had spoken up about Oswald’s alibi, most of the conspiracy theories could have been put to rest.

Newman Could Have Saved Them From Jail

Newman

NBC

Some theorists believe that if Newman had tagged along with the group to Paris, he could have saved the group from going to jail. Some believe that Newman would have felt a kinship with the large gentleman being mugged and attempted to help him. Even if he hadn’t, he could’ve used his powers within the US Postal Service to free them from jail, although it’s fair to assume he might just free himself.

George Will Be Murdered After They Are Released From Jail

Seinfeld Trial

NBC

George had basically ruined Susan’s father’s life by burning down his cabin, outing him as homosexual, and killing his daughter, so it’s fair to assume he’d be in a bad place afterward. In the series finale, we see Susan’s dad buy a gun, which implies he will shoot George. After the gang is released from jail, do you think it's safe to assume Susan’s father will be waiting to kill George? The Curb Your Enthusiasm season 7 reunion negates this theory, but that's a show in a show so who really cares!?

George’s Brother Left New York To Raise His Baby

We find out early on that George has a brother in the season 3 episode “The Suicide,” when he tells a psychic he has a brother who once impregnated a girl named Pauline. Some think maybe George brought up Pauline to his brother, leading the brother to kill himself, but that seems pretty far-fetched. For a new hot take, let's say George called his brother, brought up Pauline, and the brother decided to go be with his bastard child, resulting in why we never see George's brother on screen. He’s living his best life in Vermont far from Estelle’s voice.

Jerry's 'Move' Was Just Going Down On Someone

Seinfeld Girlfriend

NBC

After listening to the descriptions Jerry gives for his “move” in “The Fusilli Jerry” one Redditor believes that Jerry might just be going down on his 73 different girlfriends. The descriptions we get are that it includes “the swirl,” “the knuckle,” and “the headboard.” Without getting too graphic, the swirl is the tongue, the knuckle is a knuckle and the headboard is going to be moving if you’re doing the first two steps right.  

Kramer Was A Drug Dealer

Kramer Smoking

NBC

While Jerry was out slinging jokes or Elaine was out inventing the Urban Sombrero, Kramer was probably getting stoned and dealing pot to all of his shady and eccentric friends. This theory submits that Kramer was a pot smoker and dealer, and it has some substantial backing. Kramer is always hungry and comes over to Jerry’s to fulfill his munchies. Obviously, this would account for why Kramer never seems to have a career, yet always has money. When he impersonated a coke dealer, he did it poorly on purpose to keep his friends from getting wise. And to think that haircut looks good, you gotta be smoking some strong stuff.

Seinfeld Missed An Opportunity For An Infinite Seinfeld Loop

Seinfeld Pitch

NBC

One theorist pointed out that he believes if Jerry’s pilot “Jerry” hadn’t been canceled, then in that show, Jerry would eventually go on to pitch an idea for a TV show about himself at NBC. The cycle goes on forever and ever as Jerry’s and Seinfeld’s continue on an infinite loop creating an even more meaningless-centric show.

Spain Was Invaded By “The Moops”

In the Seinfeld universe, Spain actually was invaded by a people called The Moops, meaning George is correct and the bubble boy was wrong all along. O.K. this one isn’t exactly on par with Multiverse of Madness, but it does make it even easier to hate the bubble boy.

Elaine Can Only Be Successful If George Is Unsuccessful

Elaine and George

NBC

Just like how the light side of the force cannot exist without the dark side, Elaine Benes can only succeed in life if George is failing miserably. In the episode, “The Opposite” we see that Elaine’s life crumbles when George’s becomes significantly better, and when George goes back to his old ways, Elaine continues to climb the ladder. Reacting to this fan theory, Jason Alexander jokingly said, “There’s two things that probably make all that true. I think the unspoken and quite obvious is that Elaine always kind of longed for George sexually and Julia of course cannot live with the idea of me succeeding in life. She feels her success is predicated on my lack of success. That’s just how she rolls.”

The Show Is Meant To Capture The Meaninglessness Of Life

Seinfeld Chinese Restaurant

NBC

Jonah Ray, Vulture’s Jesse David Fox, and Polygon’s Dave Schilling spoke about the “purgatory” the show wants to convey on an episode of Galaxy Brains. Fox stated, “ I think Purgatory is exactly it. The show, at least Jerry’s version of the show, is Waiting for Godot. These people are stuck reliving the same conversations about nothing. It’s not a show where it’s a show about nothingness. Nothing happens. There’s the story of how Jerry put a picture of Earth seen from space in the writers room to explain to people, this doesn’t matter. What we’re doing is just this is just our lot and then we’re going to be dead in one hundred years or whatever, and no one’s going to care about this. In Larry’s version of the show, everyone gets in each other’s way and it’s like these complicated plots. Jerry doesn’t care about the complicated, but Jerry just wants these people to have nothing happen to them, that they go through all these journeys and then they’re in the exact same spot. The Chinese restaurant episode is like a further distillation of the show. There’s no plot. Literally it’s them waiting for their table. And even when their table is called, it’s like that sort of complete meaninglessness. I think it captures the darkest part of the show.

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