The 6 Most Needlessly Detailed Wikipedia Entries
Wikipedia has become an irreplaceable resource for anyone looking to find just enough possibly factual information to fake their way through a conversation about any given topic. But the problem with a massive encyclopedia that can be edited by anyone is that, well, it can be edited by anyone. And clearly, some people just have no clue what the word "edit" even means.
Here are six needlessly detailed Wikipedia entries ...
Henry VI, Part 3
Word Count: 24,053
What You Could Be Doing Instead: For a mere 1,774 words more, you could just read the damn play.
Most Useless Section: The "Language" section, a nearly 2,000-word behemoth wall of text that breaks the play down in language normally reserved for trying to explain the importance of a holding penalty late in the fourth quarter of a Monday Night Football game to a person who doesn't watch sports.
Wikipedia's version of the diaries from the movie Se7en.
Read It Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_VI,_Part_3
No Country for Old Men (film)
Word Count: 31,002
What You Could Be Doing Instead: If Wikipedia is to be believed, and it always is, the page for this film is longer than a large novella. So you could read one of those. Alternately, you could drink in the Wikipedia pages of far superior films like Casablanca, The Godfather, Gone With the Wind and Lawrence of Arabia, which have a combined total of just 30,830 words dedicated to them.
Most Useless Section: The table of contents has 14 sections and 24 subsections.
Is this a franchise or just one movie?
Read It Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_Country_for_Old_Men_(film)
Glossary of Cue Sports Terms
Word Count: 37,490
What You Could Be Doing Instead: According to this whiny bastard, an experienced pool player using BCA rules can play around 10 games of pool per hour. That's 25 games in the two and a half hours it would take to read this trivial bullshit.
Most Useless Section: The definition for the term "put up money." They already have a word for that, it's called a "bet."
Also, what in the living hell does "stakehorse" mean? If your definition involves a word nobody has ever heard of, it's not a definition. You're probably safe to cut that one for brevity's sake.
Read It Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_of_cue_sports_terms
4 (Beyonce Knowles album)
Word Count: 12,099
What You Could Be Doing Instead: Beyonce's own Wikipedia page is only 11,762 words long. Either the people editing that page are supremely lazy, or Beyonce and Jay-Z have used their alleged Illuminati connections to make sure no tabloid stuff makes it through the editorial filter. It's probably the former, but we sincerely hope it's the latter.
Most Useless Section: The "Personnel" section, where apparently even the janitor who cleaned up the CD pressing plant at night has added his name to the list of people who helped make this album happen.
You can't really see it, but we handled wardrobe design.
Read It Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/4_(Beyonc%C3%A9_Knowles_album)
List of Advanced Dungeons & Dragons Second Edition Monsters
Word Count: 26,906
What You Could Be Doing Instead: If we're reading this dorky table of contents correctly, that massive word count is for a list of just 44 monsters, meaning each one has an average of 600 words written about it on Wikipedia. Meanwhile, the entire Wikipedia write-up for Advanced Dungeons & Dragons and Dungeons & Dragons Second Edition clocks in at just over 1,300 words.
Most Useless Section: Most of them, according to this message posted right on the page.
You don't need to use Wikipedia to figure that out!
Read It Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Advanced_Dungeons_%26_Dragons_2nd_edition_monsters
Larry Norman
Word Count: 21,150
What You Could Be Doing Instead: To answer the obvious question, Larry Norman is a Christian singer who we mistakenly thought shared a name with a strain of Canadian cancer for a very brief moment but definitely shares a face with pretty much any member of the Allman Brothers Band.
If his Wikipedia page were a book of the New Testament, it would be the fourth largest.
Most Useless Section: Probably any section that led to Christian singer Larry Norman having a more information-packed Wikipedia page than Jesus (20,648 words).
Read It Here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Larry_Norman
