Ted E.
The 16 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (10/31/17)
The news is like a haunted house, but with a lot more jump-scares.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (8/29/17)
Keeping up with the news is like jumping into a passing flash mob.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (8/22/17)
We get it. You'd rather chew your own foot off than check the news right now.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (5/30/17)
The weekly news cycle is like a labyrinth without all the David Bowie.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (12/6/16)
The media seems to exist in some kind of bizarro universe where nothing is canon.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (11/1)
Look, we get it. At this point in the election cycle, checking the news is just asking for a migraine.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (10/25)
Look, we get it. You can either get your Hillary Quinn costume done by Halloween or keep up with the news.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (10/18)
Keeping up with the news is like sweeping up after a parade made entirely out of elephants drinking espresso.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/12)
Look, we get it. You're way too busy roaming the streets trying to catch Pokemon with your cellphone to catch the news. We're here to help.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/5)
There's a reason there's no such thing as C-SPAN and chill.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 16 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (5/31)
The news media is the crying baby seated next to you on the 12-hour plane ride of life.
- Authors
- By Ted E., Scott Laffey
- Published
The 16 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (3/15)
The news is like a series of strangers saying, 'This milk is spoiled! Here, smell it! I SAID SMELL IT.'
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 15 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (3/8)
The news is crafted specifically to cater to people who enjoy being angry and/or terrified.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (3/1)
The news can seem like this is all an elaborate prank being played by a billionaire for his reality show.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech, Scott Laffey
- Published
The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (2/23)
Today's news is like a less plausible version of the wacky fake headlines from 1980s movies set in the future.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech
- Published
The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (2/16)
The news is like 'The Walking Dead,' only without that show's sense of naive optimism.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech
- Published
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (2/9)
The news is like an alarm that sounds 24 hours a day, alternately screaming that you're going to die and that you need to ask your doctor about erectile dysfunction pills.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech
- Published
The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (2/2)
Trying to keep up with the news is like trying to binge-watch every movie in the 'Gory Psychological Horror' and 'Violent Political Drama' categories on Netflix.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech
- Published
The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (1/26)
Trying to keep up with the news is like trying to clean up post-blizzard snow drifts by pissing on them.
- Authors
- By Ted E., T. S. Obiech
- Published
