If Time Machines Were Built By Real Men
You can tell a lot about a person by how they use their time machine. Too often we see chrononauts waste their awesome power to perform at a high school dance or looper a looplooper of themselves. Rip Hunter ... Time Master didn't fret around time like an asshole. All day he was riding giant crabs or jump-kicking aliens, and his three sidekicks didn't give a shit that none of it had anything to do with time. If Rip Hunter told their time sphere to go back to the era of giant crabs, it only said, "FUCKING VROOM."
His adventures were, without exception, an unrelenting assault of fists and nonsense. Rip Hunter handled time travel with all the grace of Bill Cosby repositioning a lover, which is a great joke after you learn he uses a snow shovel. Rip left ray guns with cavemen. He punched out world leaders. He once collected Cleopatra, Helen of Troy, and other historical women just to see who was prettiest and it instantly turned into a catfight. The point is, he's the best and you're in luck, because I've uncovered a classic Rip Hunter ... Time Master adventure never seen before. Man Comics presents:
For more of his manly manness, see 24 Video Game Covers To Double Your Testosterone or If Men's Magazines Were Way Manlier.
Also learn how you can technically catch up in age to your parents in 7 Theories On Time That Would Make Doc Brown's Head Explode, and find out why everything in the past would be virtually inedible to you in 6 Time Travel Realities Doc Brown Didn't Warn Us About.
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