What You Should Know About Ken Bone
For the past week and a half, we've not been able to open Twitter without seeing a nonstop barrage of photos of this guy:
Photoshops, memes, witty comments, retweets, offhanded references ... and now, for some reason, his sexual fetishes are making national news.
We got curious as to why he was suddenly one of the most famous people in the country, so we finally looked it up. It turns out he's an average guy who asked an average question at the second presidential debate. Here are Ken Bone's entire 15 seconds:
If you're like us and didn't know who he is or why he's famous, we've put together a simple FAQ to lay out everything you need to know about Ken Bone.
Why is he famous?
He's an average, overweight, balding man with a mustache and a bright red sweater. After the debate, he used a disposable camera to take pictures. People thought that was hilarious.
He used a disposable camera? Hahaha! Why?!
They didn't allow phones or electronic devices at the debate. Also, it doesn't matter.
What was the question he asked that made him famous?
"What steps will your energy policy take to meet our energy needs, while at the same time remaining environmentally friendly and minimizing job loss for fossil power plant workers?" That's not why he became famous.
Who is he voting for?
It doesn't matter. His vote is exactly as important as yours.
What is all this talk about the porn channel he frequented on Reddit?
It doesn't matter. His sexual fetishes mean absolutely nothing to anyone other than himself and his wife.
He's married? What does his wife think about all this?
It doesn't matter. You don't know her.
What's his opinion on the Trayvon Martin shooting?
It doesn't matter. He is one voice in a sea of millions. His view on the shooting should not affect yours in any way.
But his Twitter account has 250,000 followers. Doesn't that make him influential?
Big Ben has 483,000 followers. Neither of their opinions should affect yours in any way.
But he was even on Jimmy Kimmel Live. That has to make him somewhat influential, right?
He was asked to be on Jimmy Kimmel Live because he was an internet buzz. His opinions should not affect yours in any way.
All the newspapers are saying he's a creep. Is he?
It doesn't matter. He is one voice in a sea of millions. His view on any subject should not affect yours in any way.
What is Ken Bone's religion?
It doesn't matter. His religious views should not affect yours in any way.
Did he really say he liked looking at Jennifer Lawrence's butthole?
Yes. This should not affect your opinions of stolen nude photos or of Jennifer Lawrence's butthole in any way.
What does his wife think of that?
It doesn't matter. You don't know her.
Isn't it frightening that an average person can achieve instant worldwide fame, only to have their entire lives scrutinized and destroyed in a matter of days?
Yes. Yes, it is.
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