Cracked Liveblogs the Final Presidential Debate
- 8:52 PM Ross Wolinsky - (tap, tap) Is this thing on?
- 8:58 PM Jack O'Brien - Quick note if an entire sentence is in ALL CAPS, that's a direct trancsript from the debate
- 8:58 PM Jack O'Brien - Or at least our best guess
- 8:58 PM Jack O'Brien - OK, live blog's LIVE
- 8:59 PM Michael Swaim - Sorry I'm late. I was letting the audience stew for a while, to build anticipation. Like a rock star.
- 9:00 PM Dan O'Brien - Thanks for the tips, Jackawanna County.
- 9:00 PM Ross Wolinsky - I'm eating a steak right now.
- 9:00 PM Michael Swaim - Except I have it on good authority that rock stars are usually just masturbating backstage, whereas I was standing a few feet from my computer writing that joke.
- 9:00 PM Ross Wolinsky - It will give me the quick energy I need to analyze political discourse.
- 9:01 PM Michael Swaim - THe political discourse our candidates are GUARANTEED to dish out. It CAN'T be boring; it's around a TABLE this time.
- 9:01 PM Dan O'Brien - My Buddy, Joe, is at this debate. Look for a remarkably tall, Asian dude. He'll probably be very well dressed, possibly sitting next to Rosario Dawson.
- 9:02 PM Ross Wolinsky - I'd like to address something right up front: A comment from someone named "Blake":
"I dont know why you guys do this. Your unfunny, infantile and immature and this debate is not a laughing matter. Your insukts towards these presidential candidates are reprehensible and I honestly hope that you guys wise up and pay attention to these issues… or do I???" - 9:02 PM Dan O'Brien - Should we stop?
- 9:02 PM Michael Swaim - I swear, you've got to watch this thing online. They have all kinds of crazy dance music before the debate.
- 9:02 PM Michael Swaim - And pop up ads.
- 9:02 PM Michael Swaim - Also, fuck Blake. Moving on.
- 9:02 PM Ross Wolinsky - Yeah. Sorry guys, liveblog is canceled.
- 9:02 PM Ross Wolinsky - Thank Blake.
- 9:02 PM Michael Swaim - 9 minute segments? 2 minute rebuttals? This is already way over my head.
- 9:02 PM Dan O'Brien - Blake the Snake.
- 9:03 PM Dan O'Brien - EZ Blake Oven.
- 9:03 PM Ross Wolinsky - Dump The Body In The Blake.
- 9:03 PM Ross Wolinsky - Don't go in the Blake. Fish piss in him.
- 9:03 PM Dan O'Brien - Blake the leaves before your father gets home.
- 9:04 PM Dan O'Brien - Or he'll blake your neck.
- 9:04 PM Michael Swaim - Obama: "Trouble in Wall Street? No, I did NOT know that. Huh. That's...I'll have to look into that. Fuck."
- 9:04 PM Ross Wolinsky - Dan: We have to stop playing your wacky name game. There's political stuff happening.
- 9:04 PM Ross Wolinsky - For starters, something is wrong with Nancy Reagan.
- 9:04 PM Michael Swaim - He's already pulling the "pray for Nancy Reagan" card.
- 9:04 PM Michael Swaim - He must be in a tight spot
- 9:04 PM Hbn Gladstone - oh here we go
- 9:04 PM Hbn Gladstone - Hi
- 9:04 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain was asked why his plan is better, and he's not saying it.
- 9:05 PM Michael Swaim - Wow, i totally didn't even notice you weren't here. I wonder what that means.
- 9:05 PM Ross Wolinsky - It goes without saying: Because he is older and whiter.
- 9:05 PM Dan O'Brien - "McCain why is your plan better than Obama's?" "Say, did you hear about Nancy Reagan?"
- 9:05 PM Ross Wolinsky - Speaking of older and whiter, ladies and gentlemen, I give you Gladstone!
- 9:05 PM Michael Swaim - Of course it'll collapse without a floor. That's just basic carpentry fact.
- 9:05 PM Hbn Gladstone - BTW, i lied on the blog. I'm not just drinking expensive scotch tonight
- 9:05 PM Dan O'Brien - Unless Obama's plan somehow put Nancy Reagan in the hospital.
- 9:06 PM Hbn Gladstone - I'm going to drink something cheaper: unicorn tears in a faberge egg goblet.
- 9:06 PM Ross Wolinsky - Obama did NOT express worry about Nancy Reagan. I guess I'm voting McCain after all.
- 9:06 PM Dan O'Brien - Obama didn't explicitly express sadness over Nancy Reagan's hospitalization.
- 9:06 PM Dan O'Brien - Hey!
- 9:06 PM Ross Wolinsky - How long you been working up that gem, G Stone Raw?
- 9:06 PM Dan O'Brien - That actually makes me want to vote for Obama.
- 9:06 PM Dan O'Brien - I want a candidate that has the balls to ignore Nancy Reagan's helpless cries.
- 9:07 PM Michael Swaim - I heard on This American Life that the rescue plan was bullshit. Ira Glass was all "nuts to that."
- 9:07 PM Dan O'Brien - I heard that, too, the Podcast? That shit was awesome.
- 9:07 PM Ross Wolinsky - I heard on This American Life that life is full of unexpected beauty and wonderment.
- 9:07 PM Hbn Gladstone - Obama said "package"
- 9:07 PM Michael Swaim - Yeah, I felt like a financial hotshot. I put on a powdered wig and everything.
- 9:08 PM Michael Swaim - Uh oh. Gladstone started drinking four hours ago.
- 9:08 PM Hbn Gladstone - OH HERE IT COMES!!!
- 9:08 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain's got a noticeable advantage: With a table in front of him, his creepy "robot arms" don't look as creepy.
- 9:08 PM Michael Swaim - The vomit? You drunk?
- 9:08 PM Hbn Gladstone - NO. The McCain smackdown
- 9:08 PM Jack O'Brien - The first question btw: I WILL ASK BOTH OF YOU: WHY IS YOUR (ECONOMIC BAILOUT) PLAN BETTER THAN HIS?
- 9:08 PM Hbn Gladstone - about JOE
- 9:08 PM Ross Wolinsky - John McCain has a weird kind of Terminator Mech Warrior kind of posture going there.
- 9:08 PM Hbn Gladstone - Thanks Jack
- 9:08 PM Jack O'Brien - Hopefully I can keep these updates this timely throughout the evening
- 9:08 PM Hbn Gladstone - Is that from the Dukakis debate
- 9:08 PM Michael Swaim - I appreciate that this guy runs the debate like a preschool. "Do you want to ask a question John? Raise your...oh, right."
- 9:08 PM Hbn Gladstone - way to be speedy
- 9:09 PM Michael Swaim - Well at least he yelled it.
- 9:09 PM Ross Wolinsky - One of John McCain's eyes just started glowing red.
- 9:09 PM Hbn Gladstone - Wait. Is Joe the Plumber a terrorist?
- 9:09 PM Dan O'Brien - Does Obama's tax plan specifically forbid Joe the plumber from doing something?
- 9:09 PM Ross Wolinsky - Did you guys see that? His eye just glowed red.
- 9:09 PM Michael Swaim - "Joe the Plumber...GIVE ME BACK MY SON!"
- 9:09 PM Dan O'Brien - POW!
- 9:09 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain's writing notes down with a sharpie marker. What a fucking baby.
- 9:10 PM Michael Swaim - Polite ripple of laughter: two points.
- 9:10 PM Dan O'Brien - "What's a matter, you can't see when you write in pen?"
- 9:10 PM Ross Wolinsky - John McCain was sent back from the future to save the economy. Unfortunately, they sent back a really, really old machine. Like a T-1912. It was a clerical error of some sort.
- 9:10 PM Hbn Gladstone - That's not a black marker. It's a tumor.
- 9:10 PM Dan O'Brien - He's actually from a future seventy years before our time
- 9:10 PM Michael Swaim - No way, man...sharpie is final. No revision. No going back. In some African tribes, the manhood rite involves drawing balls on your own forehead with a fresh sharpie.
- 9:10 PM Dan O'Brien - Wait, is Joe the Plumber an actual guy?
- 9:10 PM Hbn Gladstone - Is Joe's last name really "the plumber"
- 9:10 PM Ross Wolinsky - That's Joe Sixpack's cousin.
- 9:10 PM Hbn Gladstone - NO
- 9:10 PM Dan O'Brien - It's Le Pumbre, he's French.
- 9:11 PM Dan O'Brien - And probably very offended.
- 9:11 PM Hbn Gladstone - It's Joe D"plumber
- 9:11 PM Michael Swaim - This guy's got the ear of everyone in power...he's like his own shadow government!
- 9:11 PM Ross Wolinsky - Wait - Obama wants to take money away from PLUMBERS?!
- 9:11 PM Hbn Gladstone - I bet joe's money has feces on it
- 9:11 PM Michael Swaim - On the plus side, our pipes will be snug and unclogged.
- 9:11 PM Dan O'Brien - I can't just see him, sitting in front of his TV, wearing a beret, eating cheese, "Saucle' Bleu! It is 'Le Plumbre!' "
- 9:11 PM Hbn Gladstone - Democrats are declaring class warfare on plumbers?
- 9:11 PM Michael Swaim - STOP SAYING JOE THE PLUMBER!!! OUR NATION IS NOT A METAPHORICAL BLUE COLLAR WORKER!
- 9:12 PM Michael Swaim - Obama wants class warfare? I better got stock up on molten gold to drop on the peasants.
- 9:12 PM Ross Wolinsky - These intellectual Muslim lefties with their tax raises and their fancy suits and even-handed temperaments... THEY WANT TO STEAL FROM PLUMBERS!
- 9:12 PM Hbn Gladstone - Joe the plumber makes over 250k.
- 9:12 PM Hbn Gladstone - DOES EVERYONE UNDERSTAND THAT???
- 9:12 PM Ross Wolinsky - Joe The Plumber doesn't know how many houses he has.
- 9:13 PM Dan O'Brien - Look, the plumbers have been dragging down this nation long enough and, frankly, I think we're all a little sick of their bullshit.
- 9:13 PM Michael Swaim - Yeah, why the hell would you increase taxes on Warren Buffet? It just hurts America...and my campaign financiers.
- 9:13 PM Hbn Gladstone - just because his last name is "the plumber" doesn't mean he's poor.
- 9:13 PM Michael Swaim - Eatin' mushrooms, savin' princesses...it's all just so glamorous.
- 9:13 PM Dan O'Brien - Knew it was coming.
- 9:13 PM Ross Wolinsky - You know what's weird? Right now there are 150 million Americans watching this thinking that McCain is winning. I wonder what that's like?!
- 9:13 PM Dan O'Brien - I applaud us all for holding off on a Mario reference for so long.
- 9:13 PM Michael Swaim - I met a homeless man named Joe The Investment Banker.
- 9:14 PM Dan O'Brien - Hope Jack is writing up this absurdly long question.
- 9:14 PM Michael Swaim - That wasn't a Mario reference; it was a reference to my friend Toph. One time he took a bunch of mushrooms and kidnapped a girl.
- 9:14 PM Hbn Gladstone - This question is just of fuck with Jack.
- 9:14 PM Michael Swaim - It was terrible.
- 9:14 PM Michael Swaim - McCain: "I'm sorry, what?"
- 9:14 PM Ross Wolinsky - Gladstone, you know we're supposed to get drunk THROUGHOUT the debate, right? Not BEFORE it?
- 9:15 PM Dan O'Brien - Obama says we've been living beyond our means, and we need to watch our spending.
- 9:15 PM Jack O'Brien - Question 2: AREN'T YOU BOTH IGNORING REALITY? WON'T SOME OF THE PROGRAMS YOU'RE PROPOSING HAVE TO BE TRIMMED...EVEN ELIMINATED? GIVE US SOME EXAMPLES OF WHAT YOU'RE PROPOSING.
- 9:15 PM Hbn Gladstone - I don't get it Jack? Is that some sort of joke?
- 9:15 PM Michael Swaim - Watch 'em dance!
- 9:15 PM Hbn Gladstone - Who's dumb idea was it to write out the questions?
- 9:16 PM Ross Wolinsky - You know they're still using two-ply in the Pentagon?
- 9:16 PM Michael Swaim - Net spending cut="I'm going to cut stuff, but seriously...nothing you like. Like, shit factories. I'm not sure why we even still have them."
- 9:16 PM Ross Wolinsky - Can you believe that shit?
- 9:16 PM Michael Swaim - Programs should work better. I'm collecting vague platitudes this debate.
- 9:16 PM Dan O'Brien - Can we cut spending on education? We TRIED pouring money into that sinking ship, and it's clearly not working. Stupid people are everywhere. Let's just cut our losses.
- 9:16 PM Michael Swaim - "You gotta spend money to make money!" Um, Barack...we have no money.
- 9:17 PM Ross Wolinsky - "I'd just like to get back to talking to something else that has nothing to do with what we're talking about."
- 9:17 PM Dan O'Brien - Is McCain not gonna say "My friends?" Not even once?
- 9:17 PM Michael Swaim - Profligate. He just cinched the librarian vote.
- 9:17 PM Ross Wolinsky - "WE NEED NUCLEAR POWER" IS NOT A CUT!
- 9:17 PM Hbn Gladstone - We don't have a drinking game
- 9:17 PM Dan O'Brien - You don't need one.
- 9:17 PM Ross Wolinsky - You don't need one
- 9:17 PM Hbn Gladstone - Unless it's drink every time Ross indicates how much he hates me
- 9:17 PM Ross Wolinsky - NOICE!
- 9:17 PM Michael Swaim - I'd say Joe the Plumber, but I'd fear making it to the end of the debate without going blind.
- 9:18 PM Hbn Gladstone - Mccain would get out a hatchet and then a scalpel??
- 9:18 PM Ross Wolinsky - The rest of us drink when Gladstone accidentally reveals his alcohol problem.
- 9:18 PM Hbn Gladstone - What does that mean
- 9:18 PM Ross Wolinsky - (drinking now)
- 9:18 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain wants to get a hatchet and THEN a scalpel. He'd be both a terrible doctor and a terrible carpenter.
- 9:18 PM Michael Swaim - Joe the Surgeon told him what to do.
- 9:18 PM Ross Wolinsky - McCain the doctor would be amputating limbs left and right.
- 9:18 PM Hbn Gladstone - He'll cut your head off and then remove your melonoma thereafter.
- 9:18 PM Ross Wolinsky - (drinking now)
- 9:19 PM Michael Swaim - I don't think he could possibly choose more obscure programs to cut.
- 9:19 PM Hbn Gladstone - AGAIN WITH THE OVERHEAD PROJECTOR!!!!!
- 9:19 PM Ross Wolinsky - Again with the projector thing.
- 9:19 PM Hbn Gladstone - And obama hates pork too. He's a muslim. Oops.
- 9:19 PM Dan O'Brien - Seriously, what the fuck is McCain's problem with Planetariums?
- 9:19 PM Ross Wolinsky - "If I am elected, I will make sure that planetariums and other educational centers receive ABSOLUTELY NO FUNDING WHATSOEVER."
- 9:19 PM Michael Swaim - No one's going to miss the "department of earmarking sugar cane overproduction to the phillipines."
- 9:19 PM Ross Wolinsky - He hates space.
- 9:19 PM Hbn Gladstone - Wait, i forgot how stupid the internet was. Obama is not a muslim. He's a Christian. Just like YOU America.
- 9:19 PM Dan O'Brien - He's not a Muslim, he's an Arab. Or a Klingon. They all kind of blend together, to me.
- 9:20 PM Hbn Gladstone - CAn we all agree that Bob Scheiffer is by far the best moderator so far?
- 9:20 PM Michael Swaim - He looks more like a vulcan.
- 9:20 PM Michael Swaim - Definitely.
- 9:20 PM Dan O'Brien - Absolutely, Gladstone.
- 9:20 PM Hbn Gladstone - Oh!!! If you want to read a smarter, funnier guy blog, go here:
- 9:20 PM Ross Wolinsky - That's Bob Scheiffer? I thought it was Charlie Rose.
- 9:20 PM Michael Swaim - He's actually extracting information. Miracles abound.
- 9:20 PM Dan O'Brien - He's a Maverick if I've ever seen one.
- 9:20 PM Dan O'Brien - Can we vote for Schieffer?
- 9:21 PM Ross Wolinsky - I think my TV has Charlie Rose.
- 9:21 PM Michael Swaim - If you vote, nerd.
- 9:21 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain's got some giant fucking eyes.
- 9:21 PM Dan O'Brien - It'd be cooler if he had giant, fucking-eyes.
- 9:21 PM Ross Wolinsky - They've seen horrible atrocities.
- 9:21 PM Ross Wolinsky - Like his wife naked. ZING!
- 9:21 PM Dan O'Brien - "Work the balls."
- 9:21 PM Michael Swaim - You heard it here kids: Don't rock the boat, try not to vote. It's not that catchy, but it's going to catch on nevertheless.|
- 9:21 PM Ross Wolinsky - (just kidding, she's a babe)
- 9:21 PM Hbn Gladstone - blog.indecision2008.com
- 9:22 PM Hbn Gladstone - Sorry, here is another live debate blog:
- 9:22 PM Michael Swaim - What the hell, Gladstone? You traitor.
- 9:22 PM Hbn Gladstone - THEY ARE ALSO LINKING US!!!
- 9:22 PM Ross Wolinsky - No, it's cool - they quoted me.
- 9:22 PM Dan O'Brien - Oh, okay.
- 9:23 PM Ross Wolinsky - Is it me, or does Obama kind of look like a muppet?
- 9:23 PM Dan O'Brien - Obama's not popular with teachers or environmentalists.
- 9:23 PM Michael Swaim - I don't care. As far as our readers know, the Internet is just one page, and I want to keep it that way.
- 9:23 PM Hbn Gladstone - It's you, Ross. you look like Praire Dawn.
- 9:23 PM Dan O'Brien - Wow, did Fox News just get a laugh?
- 9:23 PM Michael Swaim - "I'm really wildly unpopular."
- 9:23 PM Ross Wolinsky - Do NOT bring up torture with John McCain.
- 9:23 PM Michael Swaim - From McCain, too.
- 9:24 PM Ross Wolinsky - Inside McCain's head: "DIDDY MAO!"
- 9:24 PM Dan O'Brien - "Teachers, Environmentalists, at least one plumber, people who enjoy torture- They all hate me."
- 9:24 PM Michael Swaim - It's nice to know the people running for office also think it's a sinkhole of fathomless bullshit.
- 9:24 PM Hbn Gladstone - McCain got his scars from Republicans??? That is news to me.
- 9:24 PM Hbn Gladstone - I thought the scars came from
- 9:24 PM Ross Wolinsky - Here's a hard-hitting question that has not been addressed: What do each of these candidates smell like?
- 9:24 PM Hbn Gladstone - Vietnemese
- 9:25 PM Hbn Gladstone - Cancer
- 9:25 PM Michael Swaim - Hatchet scars or scalpel scars? Big difference.
- 9:25 PM Hbn Gladstone - and Ross.
- 9:25 PM Ross Wolinsky - What do you call Palin? That's a tumor that, once removed, will leaYve a nasty scar.
- 9:25 PM Dan O'Brien - And a trail of slime.
- 9:25 PM Michael Swaim - Hey, you boned her a week ago, if you'll recall. At least by digital proxy.
- 9:25 PM Ross Wolinsky - I believe you're thinking of Slimer, Dan.
- 9:25 PM Dan O'Brien - Oh, good, we're talking about their Campaign Ads. How important for the future of this nation.
- 9:26 PM Ross Wolinsky - Very similar, but Slimer's latest child was not retarded.
- 9:26 PM Michael Swaim - Has there EVER been a campaign that didn't turn nasty? I think FDR's opponent called him a "doddering old fag."
- 9:26 PM Dan O'Brien - How fucking important. I want a president who's wise enough to make catchy commercials.
- 9:26 PM Jack O'Brien - BS: BOTH OF YOU PLEDGED TO TAKE THE HIGH ROAD IN THIS CAMPAIGN YET IT HAS TURNED VERY NASTY...
- 9:26 PM Michael Swaim - McCain: "tough campaign...not quite as tough as my campaign in VIETNAM. COME ON!"
- 9:26 PM Hbn Gladstone - Segregation is the worst aspect in American history?
- 9:27 PM Hbn Gladstone - Does it top slavery?
- 9:27 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain: "This campaign might sound dirty to YOU, but that's only because you haven't spend time in a two foot by four foot cage in Vietnam. Talk about dirty. FUCKING TALK ABOUT DIRTY!"
- 9:27 PM Michael Swaim - If he had even one outburst like that, I think I'd have to question my severe liberal bias.
- 9:28 PM Ross Wolinsky - They should have a torture-off. I bet Obama could take more.
- 9:28 PM Dan O'Brien - Then they should have a cancer off.
- 9:28 PM Michael Swaim - Obama's got the aloof, but slightly sarcastic smirk DOWN.
- 9:28 PM Ross Wolinsky - Yes - and torture each other with the ribbons.
- 9:28 PM Michael Swaim - It's like he's constantly saying "yeah, sure, whatevs."
- 9:28 PM Dan O'Brien - Totally. He's saying "I'm better than you," but he's not being elitist about it, somehow.
- 9:29 PM Michael Swaim - Wow, is the audience in complete darkness? The temptation to sleep/make out must be intolerable.
- 9:29 PM Ross Wolinsky - He left his monocle at home.
- 9:29 PM Michael Swaim - Especially if Palin's in the audience.
- 9:29 PM Ross Wolinsky - He does have a tiny pair of gold binoculars in his pocket, though.
- 9:29 PM Hbn Gladstone - Obama speaks as slowly as I did in the first Hate By Numbers.
- 9:29 PM Dan O'Brien - She's not. (Someone PLEASE take this bitch off my hands.)
- 9:29 PM Michael Swaim - And I did in the first S.W.A.I.M.
- 9:29 PM Ross Wolinsky - Here we go...
- 9:30 PM Michael Swaim - I think every visionary orator goes through it, Wayne.
- 9:30 PM Ross Wolinsky - Gladstone, do you have a Facebook profile I can befriend?
- 9:30 PM Hbn Gladstone - Oh, right Swaim. I'm so glad I finally know what you look like.
- 9:30 PM Dan O'Brien - And I did in my high school production of "The Man Who Came to Dinner"
- 9:30 PM Michael Swaim - Which is what we are, to be clear. Visionary. Geniuses.
- 9:30 PM Ross Wolinsky - HE LIKES FOOTBALL?!?!?!
- 9:30 PM Ross Wolinsky - McCain likes football!!!
- 9:30 PM Ross Wolinsky - Whoa... did he just go from football to stem cell research? He's GOOD.
- 9:31 PM Michael Swaim - Quite a segue.
- 9:31 PM Dan O'Brien - To be fair, he's senile. He has no idea.
- 9:31 PM Hbn Gladstone - Not only does McCAin support stem cell. He keeps a petri dish on his face.
- 9:31 PM Michael Swaim - To IMMIGRATION.
- 9:31 PM Michael Swaim - Wow.
- 9:31 PM Ross Wolinsky - It's like stream of consciousness.
- 9:31 PM Ross Wolinsky - He's basically doing beat poetry.
- 9:31 PM Ross Wolinsky - This is Def Poetry Election.
- 9:31 PM Michael Swaim - All they ever do is talk shit about each other and then complain about the shit being talked. This is like running on a hamster wheel.
- 9:32 PM Michael Swaim - Which reminds me of foreign policy.
- 9:32 PM Michael Swaim - SEGUE!
- 9:33 PM Dan O'Brien - Obama just called us cynical.
- 9:33 PM Dan O'Brien - Typical political bullshit.
- 9:33 PM Michael Swaim - Sarcastic chuckling is like one of the cornerstones of a Presidential campaign.
- 9:33 PM Dan O'Brien - And then he said "Tit."
- 9:33 PM Ross Wolinsky - do you guys see the "PWND!!!" sign over McCains head right now?
- 9:33 PM Hbn Gladstone - Obama just came off so cool.
- 9:33 PM Ross Wolinsky - That was awesome.
- 9:33 PM Ross Wolinsky - HE GANGSTA!
- 9:33 PM Dan O'Brien - McCain says he's proud of the people who comes to his rallies.
- 9:33 PM Dan O'Brien - It should be stated that his rally crowd just booed him last week.
- 9:34 PM Michael Swaim - "Follow up question: DO YOU pal around with terrorists?"
- 9:34 PM Dan O'Brien - "I find not-taking-my-bullshit to be quite an admirable quality."
- 9:34 PM Michael Swaim - "DO YOU?!"
- 9:34 PM Dan O'Brien - "You guys are the real heroes."
- 9:34 PM Hbn Gladstone - What Barack just say?
- 9:34 PM Dan O'Brien - "I didn't say those statements..."
- 9:34 PM Michael Swaim - Wow, he spun Barack defending himself into an attack on war heroes.
- 9:35 PM Ross Wolinsky - Gladstone - go drink a big glass of water, take some aspirin and go to bed.
- 9:35 PM Michael Swaim - That's like when I used to hit my brother in the arm and then get him sent to his room.
- 9:35 PM Michael Swaim - Gladstone--Fuck Ross. Drink a handle of gin, put on fingerless mittens, and hack at the keyboard wildly.
- 9:36 PM Ross Wolinsky - Do it for Blake.
- 9:36 PM Ross Wolinsky - Blake would want it this way.
- 9:36 PM Michael Swaim - The Blakehouse.
- 9:36 PM Dan O'Brien - This is a new level. The question was about Campaign Ads, and McCain didn't talk about that, (he talked about rallies). And OBAMA is addressing a NEW issue. He's avoiding an issue that itself is an evasion of an issue.
- 9:36 PM Dan O'Brien - With Sandra Bullake?
- 9:36 PM Michael Swaim - The answer is usually four to five logical steps away from the question.
- 9:37 PM Michael Swaim - Allow me to demonstrate: "What is two plus two?" "Ducks have bills."
- 9:37 PM Ross Wolinsky - You know what's an excellent, filling breakfast? Blake and eggs.
- 9:37 PM Michael Swaim - Put a suit on that and send it out on the campaign trail.
- 9:37 PM Dan O'Brien - More excellent than Blakon?
- 9:37 PM Michael Swaim - Oops, Obama gave away his age. That's never good. You want that Tiger Beat voting block.
- 9:38 PM Ross Wolinsky - Mike, you mean Gladstone's Facebook friends?
