Dead People Are Going To Hate The New Spooky Pokemon Go

At first, this spookymon news seems fun. Who doesn't want to catch an adorable little grim reaper? But there is a group of people who will suffer from this news: dead people. At least, the ones buried in graveyards.

Pokemon Go players already have a hard time keeping out of graveyards. Imagine the chaos that the new spooky Pokemon will create. The game creators are absolutely not going design it so you're more likely to find spooky Pokemon in cemeteries (they'd be sued to death, then their ghosts would be sued). But that won't stop players from thinking they'll get some kind of perk for hunting in a graveyard, or just going there for the ambiance. Imagine living a good life, making it to 90 years old, and dying, only to have a bunch of adult children brag about their Magikarps on top of your freshly dug grave.

Even if you try to haunt them, they'll just think you're a ultra rare new generation Pokemon, and they'll hurl virtual Pokeballs at your ethereal manifestation. They'll frighten away your mourners with their extensive, unsolicited explanation of MewTwo's character arc. If the dead every rise up to eat the living, they'll start with Pokemon Go players.